Top Gear quotes
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[Before the caravan drop on the Hilux]
Jeremy: The Americans have used daisy cutters on these things, to no avail. But I have something much more powerful... [cuts to a parked caravan; voiceover] The Mistral GT... [shows the same caravan dropped on the Hilux]
Jeremy: The Americans have used daisy cutters on these things, to no avail. But I have something much more powerful... [cuts to a parked caravan; voiceover] The Mistral GT... [shows the same caravan dropped on the Hilux]
[disappointed by the SLR's interior]
Richard: There's plastic - [raps on dash] - in here. Come on.
Richard: There's plastic - [raps on dash] - in here. Come on.
[discovering that his SL55's remote unlocker works from further away if he holds it against his temple]
Jeremy: What have I done to my head?!
Jeremy: What have I done to my head?!
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: In tonight's programme: As you've just seen - The Stig has gone Top Gun; James will be looking at the new 5-Series BMW and I'll be giving myself a brain tumour!
Jeremy: In tonight's programme: As you've just seen - The Stig has gone Top Gun; James will be looking at the new 5-Series BMW and I'll be giving myself a brain tumour!
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: Tonight: Audi's new V6 ankle bracelet; A moment of madness from Aston Martin; And Johnny Vegas in our Reasonably-Priced Car - which should be interesting since he can't drive!
Jeremy: Tonight: Audi's new V6 ankle bracelet; A moment of madness from Aston Martin; And Johnny Vegas in our Reasonably-Priced Car - which should be interesting since he can't drive!
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: Tonight: Cameron Diaz tests Lamborghini's lightweight Murciélago naked; We drive Schumacher's F1 Ferrari; And our Star in a Reasonably-Priced Car is her Majesty, the Queen.
Jeremy: Tonight: Cameron Diaz tests Lamborghini's lightweight Murciélago naked; We drive Schumacher's F1 Ferrari; And our Star in a Reasonably-Priced Car is her Majesty, the Queen.
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: Tonight: I attempt to destroy the indestructible; How fast can you go in a soft top before you lose your wig?; And we momentarily silence Simon Cowell.
Jeremy: Tonight: I attempt to destroy the indestructible; How fast can you go in a soft top before you lose your wig?; And we momentarily silence Simon Cowell.
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: Tonight: James drives a car that you can hand on to your grandchildren; I engage reheat in a hot Saab; And Richard almost drowns!
Jeremy: Tonight: James drives a car that you can hand on to your grandchildren; I engage reheat in a hot Saab; And Richard almost drowns!
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: Tonight: Richard drives a green Lamborghini; James drives a blue Lamborghini; and I drive a yellow Lamborghini.
Jeremy: Tonight: Richard drives a green Lamborghini; James drives a blue Lamborghini; and I drive a yellow Lamborghini.
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: Tonight: Richard drives a pair of wheeled accessories; I discover if the Australians are better at cars than they are at rugby; and James tries to finish the job of killing our Toyota.
Jeremy: Tonight: Richard drives a pair of wheeled accessories; I discover if the Australians are better at cars than they are at rugby; and James tries to finish the job of killing our Toyota.
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: Tonight: Richard drives the new McLaren Mercedes; I try Birmingham's latest head banger; and we stage the first ever Top Gear Boffin Burnout.
Jeremy: Tonight: Richard drives the new McLaren Mercedes; I try Birmingham's latest head banger; and we stage the first ever Top Gear Boffin Burnout.
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: Tonight: we drive like this... (showing a corner being tackled sideways) on the road!!!... Stephen Fry in our Reasonably-Priced Car... and how many caravans can you jump with a Volvo?
Jeremy: Tonight: we drive like this... (showing a corner being tackled sideways) on the road!!!... Stephen Fry in our Reasonably-Priced Car... and how many caravans can you jump with a Volvo?
[examining Jay Kay's Miura SV]
Richard: Um, Jay, I did notice there's, uh, there's no window in.
Jay: Well, I'll tell you what I did with the window. [opens driver's door]
Richard: Re-enact it for us.
Jay: I will re-enact it.
Richard: Go on, then.
[Jay shuts the door normally and mimes the window shattering]
Richard: Oh, you closed the door! You mad, impetuous rock star fool. You were asking for trouble, Jay!
Jay: You know, I mean, that's rock 'n roll, hey?
Richard: Um, Jay, I did notice there's, uh, there's no window in.
Jay: Well, I'll tell you what I did with the window. [opens driver's door]
Richard: Re-enact it for us.
Jay: I will re-enact it.
Richard: Go on, then.
[Jay shuts the door normally and mimes the window shattering]
Richard: Oh, you closed the door! You mad, impetuous rock star fool. You were asking for trouble, Jay!
Jay: You know, I mean, that's rock 'n roll, hey?
[for a joke, Clarkson claims that the car issues insulting voice messages if the traction control is engaged]
Monaro: Backs to the wall, everyone, there's a pom on board! He's turned the traction control on! What a poofter.
Monaro: Backs to the wall, everyone, there's a pom on board! He's turned the traction control on! What a poofter.
[having interrupted the second Toyota torture film at a critical moment]
James: I'll show you what happened later.
Richard: That's evil!
James: It stops people turning over to Heartbeat.
James: I'll show you what happened later.
Richard: That's evil!
James: It stops people turning over to Heartbeat.