Top Gear quotes
1565 total quotesAll Seasons
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[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: In tonight's show: a supercar from a shed in Leicestershire; a rock star in our Reasonably-Priced car; and how many bikes can you jump with a bus.
Jeremy: In tonight's show: a supercar from a shed in Leicestershire; a rock star in our Reasonably-Priced car; and how many bikes can you jump with a bus.
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: In tonight's show: Grannies doing Doughnuts; is the new Mini any good?; Ultimate Force in our Reasonably-Priced car; and the bed spring with a bike engine takes on the Zonda around our track.
Jeremy: In tonight's show: Grannies doing Doughnuts; is the new Mini any good?; Ultimate Force in our Reasonably-Priced car; and the bed spring with a bike engine takes on the Zonda around our track.
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: On tonight's Top Gear: Steve Coogan has a go in our reasonably priced car; buying a used Nissan Skyline; and we give world rally champion Richard Burns a taste of his own medicine.
Jeremy: On tonight's Top Gear: Steve Coogan has a go in our reasonably priced car; buying a used Nissan Skyline; and we give world rally champion Richard Burns a taste of his own medicine.
Jeremy: [to a young woman on the street] What have you got for a price of a Vanquish, then...? That house there?
Young Woman: Mmm-hmm
Jeremy: Detached house: three bedrooms; lounge, whatever one of those is... three bedroom house, for about the same as the Aston. Would you rather have that house or that car.
Young Woman: The car.
Jeremy: Good girl.
Young Woman: Mmm-hmm
Jeremy: Detached house: three bedrooms; lounge, whatever one of those is... three bedroom house, for about the same as the Aston. Would you rather have that house or that car.
Young Woman: The car.
Jeremy: Good girl.
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: In tonight's Top Gear: The most relaxing way to spend 280,000 pounds on a car; Richard reveals a budget Bond car; and a floppy haired star in our reasonably priced car.
Jeremy: In tonight's Top Gear: The most relaxing way to spend 280,000 pounds on a car; Richard reveals a budget Bond car; and a floppy haired star in our reasonably priced car.
[on the Bentley]
Jeremy: You probably think there's nothing to be scared of. You probably think you can handle it--like heroin. But look... I mean, I'm going 60 miles an hour--just a little cough [lets out a cartoonish cough] and we're doing 70... and then we're going 80... and now we're doing 90... I'm and starting to feel drowsy, 'cause it's so relaxing, as we go past 100, and 110 [trails off]... 130!
Jeremy: You probably think there's nothing to be scared of. You probably think you can handle it--like heroin. But look... I mean, I'm going 60 miles an hour--just a little cough [lets out a cartoonish cough] and we're doing 70... and then we're going 80... and now we're doing 90... I'm and starting to feel drowsy, 'cause it's so relaxing, as we go past 100, and 110 [trails off]... 130!
[trying to get a phone number stored on the Mercedes-Benz W220's system]
Jeremy: 349
Female Computer Voice: 249
Jeremy: Why don't you listen?
Female Computer Voice: Dialing.
Jeremy: No! Don't dial that! I don't know who that is, it might be the Queen!
Jeremy: 349
Female Computer Voice: 249
Jeremy: Why don't you listen?
Female Computer Voice: Dialing.
Jeremy: No! Don't dial that! I don't know who that is, it might be the Queen!
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: In tonight's Top Gear: Evidence that the French have gone mad; evidence that the Germans have gone mad; and as an oasis of sanity, the grannies are back!
Jeremy: In tonight's Top Gear: Evidence that the French have gone mad; evidence that the Germans have gone mad; and as an oasis of sanity, the grannies are back!
Jeremy: One of these days, he's gonna kill himself and we're gonna need a new Stig.
[on the Renault Vel Satis]
Jeremy: It's capable of going fast in the same way that Queen Victoria was capable of running. It just doesn't seem to like it very much.
Jeremy: It's capable of going fast in the same way that Queen Victoria was capable of running. It just doesn't seem to like it very much.
[Presenting the new BMW Z4]
Richard: You can stick a BMW badge on a dead cat - and people would still buy it.
Richard: You can stick a BMW badge on a dead cat - and people would still buy it.
Jeremy: The star we have tonight in our reasonably-priced car may look like a boy, but he is, in fact, called Tara. And that, I suppose, makes him a girl.
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: In tonight's Top Gear: rock star in our reasonably priced car; I learn how to drive a Lotus Elise properly; and it's religious racing as we find the fastest faith.
Jeremy: In tonight's Top Gear: rock star in our reasonably priced car; I learn how to drive a Lotus Elise properly; and it's religious racing as we find the fastest faith.
[on the fastest faith]
Jeremy: It's the 16th Century all over again! The Catholics come in second!
Jeremy: It's the 16th Century all over again! The Catholics come in second!
[During the opening sequence.]
Jeremy: In tonight's Top Gear: A Knight in our reasonably priced car; Maserati's new coupe takes on our track; and lock out your door mirrors: we set out to find Britain's fastest white van driver.
Jeremy: In tonight's Top Gear: A Knight in our reasonably priced car; Maserati's new coupe takes on our track; and lock out your door mirrors: we set out to find Britain's fastest white van driver.