Top Gear quotes
1565 total quotesAll Seasons Season 1 Season 2 Season 3 Season 4 Season 5 Season 6 Season 7 Season 8 Season 9 Season 10 Season 11 Season 12 Season 13 Season 14 Season 15
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[Richard is first off the plane, but the others don't follow him]
Richard: YOU BASTARDS!
James: [to Jeremy, who's in front of him] Did you stall?
Jeremy: [feigning innocence] Yes, I did!
[a little later, after a rush from the landing plane]
Jeremy: Did you make it?
Richard: I'm alive! I'm hiding in a big shed!
Richard: YOU BASTARDS!
James: [to Jeremy, who's in front of him] Did you stall?
Jeremy: [feigning innocence] Yes, I did!
[a little later, after a rush from the landing plane]
Jeremy: Did you make it?
Richard: I'm alive! I'm hiding in a big shed!
[The Top Gear Presenters are driving through a Norwegian town and are testing the "de-icing" implement of their "Snowbine", which is essentially a flamethrower. Naturally, this makes Jeremy very excited.]
Jeremy: [a la Arthur Brown] I AM THE GOD OF HELLFIRE AND I BRING YOU...
[he sends out a jet of flame behind the Snowbine]
Jeremy: ...FIRE!
Jeremy: [a la Arthur Brown] I AM THE GOD OF HELLFIRE AND I BRING YOU...
[he sends out a jet of flame behind the Snowbine]
Jeremy: ...FIRE!
[to Albanian mechanic]
Jeremy: [gesturing] So, running, then stop.
James: That describes most breakdowns really.
Jeremy: [gesturing] So, running, then stop.
James: That describes most breakdowns really.
[Trying to fit a very large "dead body" in the back of a car]
Jeremy: This was hopeless. So rather embarrassingly, we had to ask the man we'd murdered to give us a hand.
[Man stands up, climbs in]
Jeremy: This was hopeless. So rather embarrassingly, we had to ask the man we'd murdered to give us a hand.
[Man stands up, climbs in]
[when their 'Sneak across Syria' plan has failed with them driving to their hotel disguised in Burkas where they see a "Welcome Top Gear" banner at the entrance]
James: I've appeared on TV in drag for nothing!
James: I've appeared on TV in drag for nothing!
[While eating burnt sausages between bread cooked by Jeremy, James and Richard]
Shane Jacobson: Hmm! My grandfather was burnt less than that when they cremated him.
James: Did you know that barbecue is an ancient Aboriginal word for diarrhoea?
Ewen Page: Well it will be after we eat this I tell you that!
Shane Jacobson: Hmm! My grandfather was burnt less than that when they cremated him.
James: Did you know that barbecue is an ancient Aboriginal word for diarrhoea?
Ewen Page: Well it will be after we eat this I tell you that!
[while trying to clear a ten-mile mountain pass, the Snowbine goes into a tank-slapper and causes Hammond to fall over backwards whilst shovelling grit, Jeremy laughs]
Richard: [screams] Where's my wedding ring?! I've lost my wedding ring!
Jeremy: Has it gone in the thing?
Richard: It must have done!
Jeremy: [voiceover] Soon, though, we had bigger things to worry about than Hammond's ring.
[the Snowbine crashes into a massive heap of snow in front of it and comes to a stop]
Richard: [screams] Where's my wedding ring?! I've lost my wedding ring!
Jeremy: Has it gone in the thing?
Richard: It must have done!
Jeremy: [voiceover] Soon, though, we had bigger things to worry about than Hammond's ring.
[the Snowbine crashes into a massive heap of snow in front of it and comes to a stop]