Cheers quotes
515 total quotesAll Seasons Season 1 Season 2 Season 3 Season 4 Season 5 Season 6
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Season 11
Sam: Let me see here, Rebecca Howe all alone and scared in a big old house. Sounds to me like a job for Sammy's Security Company, we get in before the burglars do!
Carla: That's what I like about you Sam; your pants are always thinkin'.
Carla: That's what I like about you Sam; your pants are always thinkin'.
Sam: So believe it or not I've given up sex entirely. But you've got to promise not to tell anyone.
Frasier: Well Sam, confidentiality is the bedrock of my profession. Besides, who'd believe it?
Frasier: Well Sam, confidentiality is the bedrock of my profession. Besides, who'd believe it?
Sam: Speaking of Mercedes, I'm kind of known as the Mercedes of guys.
Rebecca: Really? I always thought you were more of a cheap pickup with a headlight missing.
Rebecca: Really? I always thought you were more of a cheap pickup with a headlight missing.
Sam: Sweetheart, I've handled trickier situations than this before. Remember the time I dated those lovely Henshaw triplets all at the same time.
Carla: Sammy first of all, that was back when you were drinking like a fish, and second of all, that was one chick.
Carla: Sammy first of all, that was back when you were drinking like a fish, and second of all, that was one chick.
Sam: What kind of problem should I make up?
Carla: Well how about this, I once took one of my kids to the school psychiatrist and he said the kid had kleptomania.
Norm: Anything come of it?
Carla: Got a couple of pens and a leather appointment book.
Norm: Or you could try using my problem. I've always had this terrible fear of being a failure.
Carla: You are a failure.
Norm: Then I've licked it.
Carla: Well how about this, I once took one of my kids to the school psychiatrist and he said the kid had kleptomania.
Norm: Anything come of it?
Carla: Got a couple of pens and a leather appointment book.
Norm: Or you could try using my problem. I've always had this terrible fear of being a failure.
Carla: You are a failure.
Norm: Then I've licked it.
Sam: You must be gettin' pretty excited.
Carla: Yeah, I thought that ice show would never get back to Boston. It has been tough. He [Eddie] misses me. The kids miss him. Not to mention that I happen to be at my sexual peak.
Sam: You've been there since you were 12.
Carla: When you find a place you like, why leave it?
Carla: Yeah, I thought that ice show would never get back to Boston. It has been tough. He [Eddie] misses me. The kids miss him. Not to mention that I happen to be at my sexual peak.
Sam: You've been there since you were 12.
Carla: When you find a place you like, why leave it?
Woody: Hey Mr. Peterson there's a cold one waitin' for ya.
Norm: I know, and if she calls I'm not here.
Norm: I know, and if she calls I'm not here.
Woody: What's goin' on, Mr. Peterson?
Norm: The flashing side of my gut that says "insert beer here."
Norm: The flashing side of my gut that says "insert beer here."
Woody: Who wants to see a rich boy get his butt whooped?
Carla: Wait a minute, I can't leave. If you're gonna fight, go fight in the back. But remember, you've got to bus your own blood.
Carla: Wait a minute, I can't leave. If you're gonna fight, go fight in the back. But remember, you've got to bus your own blood.
[A pregnant Lilith enters the bar.]
Lilith: Lay your hands upon me everyone, I am life. I am mother. My man's seed is nourished within me. [To Sam] Touch my breasts, my friend, I am lactating.
Sam: Boy, I tell ya, this is kind of a first for me, uh, but I'm gonna pass.
Lilith: Lay your hands upon me everyone, I am life. I am mother. My man's seed is nourished within me. [To Sam] Touch my breasts, my friend, I am lactating.
Sam: Boy, I tell ya, this is kind of a first for me, uh, but I'm gonna pass.
[Rebecca passionately kisses Norm]
Rebecca: I don't know what got into me. Please apologize to Vera.
Norm: Are you kidding? After that Vera should apologize to me.
Rebecca: I don't know what got into me. Please apologize to Vera.
Norm: Are you kidding? After that Vera should apologize to me.