Woody: But so help me God, if a man with a thumb answers...Hold on. It's him. It's the thumb guy and you know what that pervert said? "Allo." What's that in English?
Norm: I took French in high school. Allo. Allo means..."I've got your girlfriend in my arms, and soon we'll be naked, you stupid cuckold."
Cliff: That's funny, Norm, because I thought it meant..."I got your girlfriend in my arms, and we're already naked, you stupid cuckold."
Frasier: Stop heckling the poor lad. Woody, it simply means...that "I enjoyed your girlfriend."

Woody: How would a beer feel, Mr. Peterson?
Norm: Pretty nervous if I was in the room.

Woody: I don't know, Dr. Crane. Haven't you ever thought that it's kind of tough on them - doing all that counseling stuff? I mean I was raised to believe that if you have a problem, you lock it away in a secret place. You keep it bottled up good and tight. And if it gets full in there, you just keep forcing the pain down and clamping it in.
Frasier: Good advice, Woody. [to Norm] Tick... tick... tick.

Woody: It's just a small part in a commercial, but I don't know if I can pull it off.
Norm: What do you play?
Woody: A bartender.
Sam: Woody, you are a bartender.
Woody: But in this commercial, I have to serve drinks.
Sam: Woody, you serve drinks all the time.
Woody: But I have to talk and serve drinks.
Sam: You talk and serve drinks everyday.
Woody: Now you've made me nervous about working here.

[Carla walks into the bar wearing a parka]
Sam: What's with the getup?
Carla: It's Indian Summer, Sam. I need these clothes for protection.
Sam: Protection from what?
Carla: The eyes of men.
Sam: What are you talking about?
Carla: Every time I've conceived a kid it's been during Indian Summer. It's when I'm at my most fertile, Sammy. I cannot let any man touch me, talk to me, or see me or I'll be shooting out kids like a Pez dispenser.