Sam: What will you have, Norm?
Norm: Well I'm in a gambling mood, Sammy. I'll take a glass of whatever comes out of that tap.
Sam: It looks like beer, Norm.
Norm: Call me Mr. Lucky.

Sam: You heard from Irene?
Coach: Well not for awhile but you're not supposed to see the bride before the ceremony anyway. Are you?
Sam: No, but you're supposed to know whether or not she's in the country at least.

[A "Jacqueline Bisset" is coming to Boston; Sam needs her to marry him to win the bet]
Sam: I guess I ought to wear something kinda nice � my best outfit. Say, Diane, when you dream about me what am I wearing?
Diane: An anthill.

[the gang took Frasier on a snipe hunt; he returns and wants them to go out again; Diane takes him into the office]
Diane: There's no such thing as a snipe hunt. They played a childish prank on you.
Frasier: I know that.
Diane: What?
Frasier: Good Lord, Diane. A man does not crouch in the woods for two hours without having a revelation or two.
Diane: So this is part of a plan and I unwittingly helped you.
Frasier: Yes.
Diane: Frasier, how devious. But, why didn't you tell me?
Frasier: Well, I couldn't trust you; you'd have thought it was too cruel.
Diane: Oh, are you kidding? I would've helped. Frasier, this is so unlike you.
Frasier: No, but it's what guys do, darling... we screw each other to the wall. Boy, it's great to be one of the gang, I'll tell you.

[The guys in the bar are ogling the Playboy models]
Diane: Oh, this is disgusting. What kind of culture do I live in where they are the ideal woman?
Coach: Well, gee, Diane. You've gotta admit: they are beautiful.
Diane: Coach, take away all their make-up, all their expensive haircuts and those bodies... and what have you got?
Carla: You.

[To help a sick Cliff, Norm offers to deliver the rest of the mail on Cliff's route]
Cliff: Ah, Norm, you're not trained. You're not qualified.
Norm: What qualified? You drop ‘em in a slot. A chimp could do it.
Cliff: You're kiddin', no way. They did a study at the University of Michigan � chimps were 32% slower. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, they were better with customer relations and everything...