Cheers quotes
515 total quotesAll Seasons
Season 1
Season 2
Season 3
Season 4
Season 5
Season 6
Season 7
Season 8
Season 9
Season 10
Season 11
Lilith: You should be decorating professionally.
Norm: Doing you folks a favor is one thing. Anymore of this interior decorating junk could really eat into my reputation as a lazy, beer-guzzling lump of mashed potatoes.
Frasier: But Norm, you have a gift.
Norm: A gift? Try a curse, pal. I spent my whole damn life trying to cover up the fact that I have a great sense of color and I always know where to put the ottoman.
Norm: Doing you folks a favor is one thing. Anymore of this interior decorating junk could really eat into my reputation as a lazy, beer-guzzling lump of mashed potatoes.
Frasier: But Norm, you have a gift.
Norm: A gift? Try a curse, pal. I spent my whole damn life trying to cover up the fact that I have a great sense of color and I always know where to put the ottoman.
Lisa: Look at me, Dad, I'm not--beautiful.
Coach: You look just like your mother.
Lisa: And Mom was not-- [Pause] comfortable with her beauty.
Coach: But that's what made her more beautiful. Your mother grew more beautiful every day of her life.
Coach: You look just like your mother.
Lisa: And Mom was not-- [Pause] comfortable with her beauty.
Coach: But that's what made her more beautiful. Your mother grew more beautiful every day of her life.
Ma Clavin: [about the retirement home] Clifford, are you sure we can afford a place like this?
Cliff: Oh, yeah, Ma. Don't worry. Your insurance policies will cover it.
Ma Clavin: Oh, that's convenient. You'll have money left for hooch and slatterns.
Cliff: Oh, yeah, Ma. Don't worry. Your insurance policies will cover it.
Ma Clavin: Oh, that's convenient. You'll have money left for hooch and slatterns.
Madeline: I'd like to help with the doctor bills.
[Cliff looks at Sam.]
Sam: That's good.
Cliff: [to Madeline] That's good.
Madeline: Anything to help ease the burden on you and your family.
[Cliff looks at Sam again.]
Sam: You're not married.
Cliff: [to Madeline] You're not married. [Sam taps Cliff on the shoulder.] I mean I'm not married. But I could be if I wanted to. Right, Sam?
Sam: Sure.
[Cliff looks at Sam.]
Sam: That's good.
Cliff: [to Madeline] That's good.
Madeline: Anything to help ease the burden on you and your family.
[Cliff looks at Sam again.]
Sam: You're not married.
Cliff: [to Madeline] You're not married. [Sam taps Cliff on the shoulder.] I mean I'm not married. But I could be if I wanted to. Right, Sam?
Sam: Sure.
Margaret: The men up in Canada well they just don't compare to you. They're just pale pathetic imitations of you, Cliff.
Carla: Boy that must be one butt ugly country.
Carla: Boy that must be one butt ugly country.
Monika: Are you with the groom's family?
Sam: I'm the best man.
Monika: I'd enjoy being the judge of that.
Season 11
Sam: I'm the best man.
Monika: I'd enjoy being the judge of that.
Season 11
Nick: [about Carla being pregnant] Hey you got a guy, Carla?
Carla: No, I swallowed a beach ball. For your information I am not seeing anybody. But the guy who knocked me up and ran this time is ten times classier than you.
Carla: No, I swallowed a beach ball. For your information I am not seeing anybody. But the guy who knocked me up and ran this time is ten times classier than you.
Nick: Hello sweetcakes. You been thinking about me?
Diane: Only during flea and tick season.
Nick: Well in my neighborhood, that's all year round.
Diane: I'm sure it is.
Diane: Only during flea and tick season.
Nick: Well in my neighborhood, that's all year round.
Diane: I'm sure it is.
Nick: I need a simple favor.
Carla: Unless it's setting your eyebrows on fire, forget it.
Carla: Unless it's setting your eyebrows on fire, forget it.
Norm: [about the player piano] Sammy, why do you keep something around here that doesn't work?
Carla: [about Diane] Because no one else will give her a job.
Carla: [about Diane] Because no one else will give her a job.
Norm: [about their conversation] Yeah, why wasn't it the stupidest?
Frasier: Well frankly it lacks meaningless statistics and inane historical trivia. Say where is Cliff anyway?
Sam: Yeah, is he still in the hospital?
Norm: I don't know. How's he doin'?
Sam: I thought you were gonna go see him.
Norm: Well I tried. I mean I got as far as the hospital lobby but you know that smell of alcohol makes me really queasy. [motions for a beer refill]
Frasier: Well frankly it lacks meaningless statistics and inane historical trivia. Say where is Cliff anyway?
Sam: Yeah, is he still in the hospital?
Norm: I don't know. How's he doin'?
Sam: I thought you were gonna go see him.
Norm: Well I tried. I mean I got as far as the hospital lobby but you know that smell of alcohol makes me really queasy. [motions for a beer refill]
Norm: [Commenting on Sam and Diane's former relationship] Hey would you two mind if we move on to something a little more interesting than your star-crossed romance?
Carla: Come on, Norm. What could be more interesting than another gripping episode of "Young and the Chestless"?
Carla: Come on, Norm. What could be more interesting than another gripping episode of "Young and the Chestless"?
Norm: Are you in pain, Woody?
Woody: No, I was just thinkin'.
Norm: Yeah, the first time's always the worst.
Woody: Who do you think Sam's gonna propose to, tonight?
Carla: What're you babblin' about, Billy Bob Joe Jim?
Woody: No, I was just thinkin'.
Norm: Yeah, the first time's always the worst.
Woody: Who do you think Sam's gonna propose to, tonight?
Carla: What're you babblin' about, Billy Bob Joe Jim?
Norm: Congratulations! Unless you didn't want another kid.
Coach: Of course, she wanted the kid, Norm.
Carla: Sure I do. What penniless unmarried mother of four wouldn't.
Coach: Of course, she wanted the kid, Norm.
Carla: Sure I do. What penniless unmarried mother of four wouldn't.