Krista Dalton: We sold battle scenarios to game designers in China! They paid a lot.
Ziva: You and your sister Debra?
Krista: Yes. Debra made contacts through her trips to Asia for her firm.
Gibbs: C Ten Dynamics?
Krista: We took some of the money, Debra and I, the rest we gave to families! Stattler made a ton of money off those kids, never gave anything back! It was old information! Useless!
Ziva: Frequency jamming signals.
Krista: For Balistic Winter. That system was being phased out.
Gibbs: It's still classified.
Krista: Technically, but --
Ziva: Which makes it technically treason.

McGee: [knocks] Ms. DeMarco, NCIS. We need to speak with you.
Tony: Ms. DeMarco, open up. We want to talk to you. [sounds of a shotgun being pumped cause Tony and McGee to take cover, then a shot is fired through the door] Federal agents! Drop it!
DeMarco: Did that piece of filth Serro send you?! Because I've got a message for him! You can tell him -- [peeks out the door] -- did you say federal agents?
Tony: Yes, federal agents!
McGee: Serro's dead! Put the weapon down!
DeMarco: Okay. [puts gun on the ground]
Tony: Hands in the air!
DeMarco: Okay. Sorry.
Tony: Who do you think you are, Sarah Palin?!

McGee: [opens his eyes to see Tony and Ziva standing in front of his desk] I'm awake.
Ziva: We didn't say anything, McGee.
McGee: But you did something, didn't you? What'd you do?! Did you try and put my hand in this water?
Tony: That's a little juvenile.
McGee: You drew on my face, didn't you? You drew on my face! [looks at his face]
Tony: No. I suggested stripping you naked, putting a tag on your toe and dragging you down to autopsy so that when you woke up you would think you were dead, but Ziva thought it was in poor taste.
McGee: Well, thank you, Ziva.

McGee: [voiceover] Anyone can achieve their fullest potential. Who we are might be predetermined, but the path we follow is always of our own choosing. We should never allow our fears or the expectations of others to set the frontiers of our destiny. Your destiny can't be changed, but it can be challenged. Every man is born as many men and dies as a single one.

McGee: Do you see this? Nine hours, 21 minutes! [shoves his watch in Ziva's face]
Ziva: Has it been that long? [takes the watch away and breaks it]
McGee: Why did you do that??
Ziva: Because it was either you or the watch!
McGee: It's just, what's taking so long, you know?
Ziva: Look, I'm sure we're not the only ones that need to be rescued. Plus, things could be a lot worse.
McGee: Yeah, how's that?
Ziva: We could be stuck here with Tony.
Tony: [from outside the elevator] I heard that! I find it very interesting that the two of you left together late last night!
Ziva: Just ignore him. He's like an annoying bug. Eventually he'll just go away.
McGee: Ziva, it's been five years. Trust me, he's not going anywhere.

McGee: Heck of a day isn't it.
Tony: You went home.
McGee: Yeah, just for an hour.
Tony: I've been talking to agents all night doing recon and you went home and got your game on with little sexy miss text message, Ziva look at him.
Ziva: What are you talking about?
Tony: He's ussing a husky cave man esk primitive satisfication like Heston in Planet of the Apes and it didn't matter that that world was ruled by arrangatanges because Heston went straight for the mute chick in the loing claw you pulled a Heston. Didn't you?
McGee: I don't know about that. It was only for a few minutes.
Tony: Yeah sometimes that's all it takes in my middle aged world.
Ziva: [LAUGHS] You are so jealous.
Tony: Yes I am and there's nothing wrong with that I'm proud of Tim, very proud of you did you take pictures
McGee: Please.
Ziva: Well I'm excited to meet her make sure she's good enough for you.

McGee: Hey, why'd the dead guy cross the road? To get home.
Tony: Yeah. You were funnier when you were fatter.

McGee: I built an application for my phone.
Tony: Why is that important to what we're doing here?
McGee: With a vehicle's VIN number, you can access all the vehicle's pertinent information, including key and remote codes. Hack into a database, download all the codes, and there it is.
Tony: Wow. I'm glad that MIT education paid off for something, McGeek.
McGee: It is pretty super, isn't it?
Tony: I don't believe you.
McGee: Yeah, I'm not going to unlock the door for you, Tony.
Tony: Well, I don't think you could unlock the door, because if you could you'd prove it to me by doing it.
McGee: Uh, no --
Tony: [snatches phone and unlocks door] You should patent that.

McGee: Is that pastrami?
Tony: [nods] Mm-hmm.
McGee: Can I have a bite?
Tony: Nuh-uh. This is my dinner. You can have the pickle.
McGee: I don't like pickles.
Tony: I know.
McGee: I hope you choke on that sandwich.

McGee: It's freezing this morning.
Tony: Man up, chilly willy. Feel that warm blood coursing through your veins. Get in touch with your inner McGrizzly Adams.
McGee: Well I've got hand warmers.
Tony: Give me one.
McGee: No.
Ziva: I'm not cold at all.
Tony: You're coldblooded David, like a lady Komodo dragon; ice queen, frigid and deadly.
Ziva: And I remembered to wear my thermal underwear.
Tony: I'll give you fifty bucks for it right now.
Ziva: It wouldn't fit. You're too big.
Tony: [desperately] It'll stretch. Turn 'em over.

McGee: Lee Wuan Kai: North Korean assassin, one time fanatical nationalist, credited with 27 targeted hits in seven countries, dozens more by association --
Tony: She likes quiet walks on the beach, laughing with friends and playing Frisbee with her Cocker spaniel Ruphus.
Ziva: [snatches the paper away] It does not say that.
Tony: Well it might as well. Look at those come hither eyes, those perfect kiss me now lips. No wonder Vance is obsessed. Kai's killing me and I'm just looking at her. You and Kai are probably a lot more alike than you think.
Ziva: I do not follow.
Tony: Really? A couple of pretty ladies, both trained assassins.
Ziva: You annoy me sometimes.
Tony: Sometimes?
Ziva: Most of the time!
Tony: Well somethiing must of happened between Kai and Vance. Seriously director shows up at a crime scene that's not kosher.

McGee: Look at this. [watching video of teenagers T-Ping a tree] Two ply, double roll, top tuck with a thirty foot vertical climb. This kid has got an arm! Perfect drapage and good trunk to top ratio. It's very impressive.
Ziva: I do not understand the humor or the art.
McGee: It's a cultural thing. Tony would tell you.

McGee: Now I understand why Tony took the couch in Paris.
Abby: Ziva said that she did.
[they look at each other understandingly]

McGee: The August 1928 issue of Amazing Stories first stirred the national imagination. It featured the Skylark of Space on the cover, and then you've got Buck Rogers.
Abby: What's really amazing is how much more fascinating jet-pack trivia gets the eleventh time you've heard it.

McGee: Well, if it isn't T-Cadd.
Tony: What?
McGee: T-Cadd. It's what I'm calling you guys now. You know, the cute couples contraction? Tom-Kat, Bennifer, Brangelina.
Tony: Yeah, we got it McBitter.
McGee: You two are wearing the same suit, even. [they smile]
McCadden: Building security found the body. No blood, it looks like he was dumped. Multiple stab wounds to the back. We've definitely got a fifth victim.
Tony: Wounds on his arm, chest. This guy wasn't easy to take out.
McGee: He put up a fight.
McCadden: Killer had to be strong, we're probably looking for a male.
Tony: Or Ziva. [they laugh]