[At E's first staff meeting at Murray Berenson, a number of female employees come into the conference room carrying several boxes of large-size pizzas]
Female Employee: These just came at the front desk for you.
E: I didn't order any pizza.
Female Employee: Ari Gold sent them. The delivery boy said "Good luck. You're no longer a pizza boy, you're now [offers boxes] a pizza man." [employees at table laugh]

[At the MGA conference room, two police officers just tied down Ari to his seat.]
Officer Nickerson: Mr Gold, if you cooperate, we'll make this as pleasant an experience as we can for you.
[His partner, Officer Morgan suddenly plays music from his evidence kit]
Ari Gold: Wait a minute. What is this, who are you guys?
Officer Morgan: BHPD, Boner Patrol. [The officers take off their clothes and start dancing around Ari]
Ari: Oh come on.
Nickerson: You're about to get your stiff inspected.
Assistant: Oh my God.
Ari: Lloyd, LLOOOOYD!!! [colleagues in and out of the conference room start laughing]
TI: [stands up and leaves] I'm out of here, Ari.
Ari: Hold on, TI!
TI: Call me when you're done with your entertainment.
Ari: Lloyd, you speak their language, MAKE IT STOP!
Lloyd: It'll be over soon Ari, just close your eyes, and think of pussy!

[At the San Diego Comic Con, E and Turtle has failed to convince RJ Spencer to drop his plans to slam Vince over his website]
Jesse Jane: [seeing Spencer walk away upon being threatened by Turtle] What the fuck is his problem?
E: He hates Vince. He's gonna trash him on his website, saying he's gonna make a shitty Aquaman.
Jane: Why? Vince would make an adorable Aquaman.
E: You should tell him that.
Turtle: Yeah sweetie, you should. If Aquaman is in trouble, and the fate of the land and all mankind is in his hands, he should unleash the power of the pussy.
Jane: Don't bullshit me, tough guy. If I do it, I'll do it because I like Vince.

[At Wilshire Boulevard Temple Ari and Nick Rubenstein try to convince studio president Arthur Gatoff about approving Vince's talent fee to replace Benicio del Toro in Medellin. He is not happy to see them]
Arthur Gatoff: This is wildly inappropriate coming to my shul, this day of all days, to discuss money. I have a bad enough reputation here after the hellish divorce I've just gone through.
Ari: At least you're at a place where you can meet a nice Jewish girl, Arthur. [Gatoff looks at him] Come on, we were at temple too. This is time sensitive, God would understand! We all have to take care of our own -
Gatoff: Ari, I have to go back inside.
Nick Rubenstein: Arthur, you said you'd meet Vince's quote.
Gatoff: You said his quote was three.
Rubenstein: I was wrong.
Gatoff: You and your father have been wrong about a lot of things on this one, Nick. Maybe animation is more your bag.
Rubenstein: Wow, cut the Rubensteins like that, on the high holiday...
Gatoff: I'm sorry, forgive me.
Rubenstein: Arthur, I forgive you, but just make a quick phone a call it'll take a second, but -
Gatoff: Nick, I don't know what goes on at that half-church reform synagogue of yours, but here, we don't talk business on Yom Kippur. Now please, before I get angry... [leaves]

[Babs is irritated at Ari crashing "The Most Powerful Women in Hollywood" testimonial party]
Babs: I want an apology. Now.
Ari: Ladies, I'm sorry I'd like to congratulate each and every one of you, but unfortunately, Barbara's cock [women gasp in shock] is all I can handle right now! Congrats again...[leaves]

[Barbara crashes the Gold Standard Agency's emergency meeting after Terrence denies Ari his settlement money]
Ari: [upon seeing Babs] Hey Babs, the Traitorous Skanks Anonymous meeting is next door.
Babs: Let's talk.
[Ari and Babs go to adjacent room]
Ari: Can't believe that you set me up after all I've done for you.
Babs: Ari, I need you to see your cards.
Ari: You've seen 'em.
Babs: How much do you need?
Ari: [flabbergasted] What?
Babs: Come on, I want to be partners.
Ari: Why?
Babs: Because I believe in you, and because I can't work with my ex-husband anymore.
Ari: No shot, this is my deal.
Babs: Ari, you have no money and I have too much.
Ari: So what do you want?
Babs: To fuck...Kidding. I want 60% of my name on top.
Ari: I'd rather fuck.
Babs: Fifty-five.
Ari: Forty-five.
Babs: Fifty-one.
Ari: Forty-nine.
[Ari and Babs return to meeting]
Ari: Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you...[raises Babs' left arm] MILLER-GOLD! Huh!!? [agents cheer; to Babs] We sound like a fucking beer.

[Billy Walsh has just read the Medellin script]
Billy Walsh: VINNY!!!
Vince: Yo.
Billy: Vincent!
Vince: Talk to me, what?
Billy: Pablo Escobar? Pablo fucking Escobar!?!? [goes up staircase] I've always wanted to make a movie about this guy since I read a story about him blowing up that airliner. I love Pablo Escobar.
E: So you like the script?
Billy: What, was I not just fucking clear?
Vince: Can you do it for 25 million?
Billy: I don't see why not. I need to talk to the financier.
E: No problem.
Billy: I love it, Vince. Thank you. We're gonna win you an Oscar.
Season 4

[Billy Walsh introduces Vince and E to the post-production crew before showing the first cut of Medellin]
Billy: Guys, my whole crew is Latin; help make this film as absolutely authentic as it could be. My editor Raul, his assistant slash little brother Terro. Both Mexican, both totally legal. My, uh, post guy's Brazilian, the caterers from Chile. Every Thursday we get that endangered sea bass flown in.
Eric: [sees very pretty Latina woman walk past him] What does she do?
Billy: She gives blow jobs. Seriously, she's a street walker I brought back from Colombia.

[Billy Walsh is commenting Vince on the script he wrote for Drama]
Billy Walsh: Some of it sucks.
Vince: It does hurt.
Walsh: But I can fix it.
Vince: So, fix it. Change anything you want, I'll take nothing personally because this movie's not for me. It's for Johnny.
Walsh: Amazing selflessness, I'm gonna use some of that for the yellow Lab's personality, if that's okay.

[Dana Gordon bails on Ari at Flay's because his plan to get back at Mrs Ari over their separation has gone awry. He receives a call.]
Ari: Hello?
Mrs Ari: [At a UNICEF event] What the fuck are you thinking?!?!
Ari: What's the problem?
Mrs Ari: What, you wouldn't think that Bobby Flay wouldn't tell me that you were out on a date?
Ari: Well, I guess the Bro Code's out the window when you're fucking someone's wife.
Mrs Ari: I am indeed hurt and quite frankly embarrassed!
Ari: How do you think I felt?
Mrs Ari: Anyone else, Ari? I mean, even if you insist on throwing it in my face, I could deal with anyone else!
Ari: What do you mean?
Mrs Ari: I always knew you were fucking Dana Gordon!
Ari: It's not true. Not since 1992.
Mrs Ari: Even when I moved out here?
Ari: I have NEVER cheated on you...but it's nice to know you still care.
Mrs Ari: How are you gonna look at me, Ari?

[Drama and a French girl who picked him up at Yair Marx's boat talk about Viking Quest, which is a big hit in France]
Drama: [Laughs] That's amazing. I didn't know that episode aired, we got cancelled in the middle of shooting it.
Jacqueline: Well, it aired here. I've seen that scene a hundred times.
Drama: A hundred? Come on.
Jacqueline: I'm not exaggerate! My whole family, especially my father, loved Viking Quest. At 9pm every Thursday, we'd be like, [speaks French dialogue]
Drama: Really?
Jacqueline: Oui! He put on my brother in the uniform that you wore on the show for his birthday. He's so funny, though his muscles are not as big as yours.
Drama: That's amazing.
Jacqueline: Amazing is meeting you. Here.
Drama: Yeah.
Jacqueline: So shall we go back to your hotel?

[Drama and Chuck Liddell have a misunderstanding over parking space]
Drama: I ain't your friend, tough guy! Yeah, that's right I know who you are, you WWF wannabe. So you get to move your car, or do I get to move it for you?
Trista Liddell: [sees father go down to face Drama] Daddy...
Chuck Liddell: [looks back at her and glares at Drama] You're lucky my daughter's in the car. I'd kick every tooth in your head out.
Drama: I'd rip off your foot while you tried.
Turtle: [intervenes] Whoa, slow down, please don't okay? Sorry about my friend, he didn't take his meds today.

[Drama appears in the kitchen to see Turtle and Vince incensed over Aaron Cohen's bodyguards being too noisy. Turtle notices Drama's disfigured face]
Turtle: What's with the face? [Vince is surprised]
Drama: They surprised me with a new scene when I got to the set last night. Battery acid sprays out of my car engine. Four hours of makeup...[voice slows to bitter murmur] for one line, compliments of Dan Coakley.
Vince: Why don't you take it off?
Drama: I gotta shoot again tonight. I can't bear another session in my makeup chair. [Splits bagel with bagel slicer he just bought]
Turtle: Now you got two bad sides.
Drama: [agitated] Don't start with me Turtle, I am exhausted! [slaps hand hard on bagel slicer]
Turtle: Oh you are? We got the Israeli Army waking us up all night, you can go home!
Drama: Baby bro is hungry, and you can go to Jamie's.

[Drama auditions for a role in CSI: Minneapolis]
Drama: You look familiar.
Audition Producer: You auditioned for me a couple of years ago.
Drama: Oh, yeah, yeah. How did that go?
Audition Producer: [pauses] You know...
Drama: Yeah, you can't book 'em all.
Season 2

[Drama catches Vince in bed with a woman]
Drama: That's not my hat, is it bro?