Gibbs: How could she not know?
Randy: We met at Mark's memorial service.
Gibbs: What'd you say? 'I was passing by, dug the music, decided to drop in?'

Gibbs: How long to find the acid and check out the rest of the chutes?
Abby: Well, I'm flying solo, so at least a day.
Gibbs: Go faster if you had an assistant?
Abby: Definitely.
Gibbs: Okay, you got the job.
Kate: I get to do forensics?
Gibbs: No, you get to schlep for Abby. She gets to do forensics.

Gibbs: If that thing came off an aircraft, someone filed a TFOA report for it.
Kate: TFOA?
Tony: Things falling off aircraft.
Kate: You're kidding.
Gibbs: Nope. Navy keeps records on that sort of thing, all the way back to biplanes.

Gibbs: NCIS does not leak. These plans get out... you can shoot DiNozzo.
Kate: No, I think I'm destined to shoot you.

Gibbs: Rule Number One: Never let suspects stay together.
Gibbs: Rule Number Two: Always wear gloves at a crime scene.
Gibbs: Rule Number Three: Don't believe what you're told. Always double check.
Kate: Should I write these rules on my Palm Pilot, or crochet them on pillows?

Gibbs: Tests? On a Navy ship?
Tony: If I heard there were gonna be tests on a Navy ship you think we'd still be standing here?
Gibbs: Oh, forgot. Your minds work concurrently.

Gibbs: That's apples and oranges.
Abby: [grins] There's a fetish for that, too.

Gibbs: We're going with you boys. NCIS training mission.
Capt. Faul: Now why don't I believe that? Hell, why not! Hate to pass up an opportunity to toss a couple of NCIS agents out of a plane.

Gibbs: We're LEO's.
TSA Agent Dennis: Ah, I'm a Capricorn.
Tony: LEO, short for Law Enforcement Officer.
Gibbs: Are you... new at this, Dennis?
Dennis: First week! [checks their papers] N-C-I-S. Never heard of it.
Gibbs: [to Tony] Now that's embarrassing.
Dennis: NCIS? That anything like CSI?
Tony: Only if you're dyslexic.

Gibbs: What do you have?
Tony: A six letter word for a reason to commit a crime...
Gibbs: DiNozzo...
Tony: That's seven letters.
Gibbs: Works for me. What do you got?

Gibbs: What if I wanted to get into that account?
Kate: (shrugs) Get a search warrant for the servers.
Gibbs: We don't have time for a warrant. What's a quicker way?
Kate: Hack into the servers.
[Gibbs tilts a brow and smiles.]
Kate: Can't believe I just said that. I would have never suggested that before I started working here.
Gibbs: You're welcome.

Gibbs: Why is that women always want to fix what doesn't need fixing?
Kate: Makes us feel all warm inside.
Gibbs: So does scotch, but it doesn't cost you a house.

Gibbs: You enjoyed playing my boss?
Ducky: I did rather.

Gibbs: You still in touch with that old NASA boyfriend?
Abby: He wasn't a boyfriend, he was a boytoy, and yes, we IM almost every day.
Gibbs: You do?
Abby: Oh yeah.
Gibbs: That's good, right?
Abby: It's very good.
[Later, during a video-conference call]
Ashton (Boytoy): Greetings from NASA, NCIS.
Abby: Whoa, Ashton, that was so Star Trek.
Ashton: Sorry, I'm late. I had a cluster of frozen reactor coolant heading for the flight path of an Atlas liftoff. I had to delay the launch. They were not happy about it. I am, however, very happy to see you, Abby, and to help your NCIS crime-fighting colleagues.
[In the background Kate and Tony exchange amazed looks at this entire exchange]

Gibbs: [describing the watch he is putting on] It's a locator. I won't activate it unless they move us.
Tony: [in a Sean Connery accent] Very James Bond - does it tell time, too?