Rachel: Ross, don't forget to take a shot of Emma's cake. It's in a box in the fridge.
Ross: Sure.
Rachel: [to Monica] You're going to love this cake! I got from from a bakery in New Jersey, Carino's!
Monica: That place has the creamiest frosting! I used to hitchhike there when I was a kid!
Rachel: Well, they make make these great novelty cakes in different shapes; and if you give them a photo, they'll copy it in icing!
Monica: Did you do a picture of Emma?
Rachel: On a cake shaped like a bunny!
Ross: Does this bakery by any chance bake erotic cakes, for bachelorette parties?
Rachel: What are you talking? -OH, MY...! They put my baby's face on a penis!
[Everyone rushes to see the cake.]
Phoebe: Now it's a party!
Rachel: This is not funny! If I wanted this cake to be a disaster, I would have baked it myself!
Joey: Is it okay that I still think it looks delicious?
Judy: Jack, look at this!
Jack: I know what you're thinking! The resemblance is uncanny!
[Everyone turns to look at Ross]
Ross: [angry] I am THIS close to tugging on my testicles again!!
Rachel: [on the phone] No, this is NOT what I ordered! I drove to New Jersey to get my daughter a cake for her birthday and I need a bunny cake right now!
Ross: Ask them if it would be faster to cut the baby's face off the penis and put it on the bunny. [to himself] That is a weird sentence.
Rachel: [on the phone with the bakery] Oh, believe you me, I am going to bring this cake back. I don't even want it in my home... JOEY, DON'T TOUCH IT!
Joey: I'm so confused!
Rachel: I still want my daughter's face on a cake, but a bunny cake! Yellow cake, chocolate frosting with nuts!
Chandler: To be fair, this one does have nuts.

Rachel: Ross, you don't seem okay.
Ross: [starts crying] I'm sorry, it must be the pressure of entertaining! I think everyone would feel better if we had some flan.

Rachel: Ross? Hi, it's me. I just got back on the plane and I just feel awful. That is so not how I wanted things to end with us. It's just that I... wasn't expecting to see you and then all of the sudden, you're there and saying these things and... now I'm just sitting here and thinking of all the stuff I should have said and I didn't. I mean, I didn't even get to tell you that I love you too. Because of course I do. I love you... I love you... I love you... what am I doing? I love you. Oh, I've gotta see you. I've gotta get off this plane.
Ross: Oh, my god!
Rachel: [to flight attendant] Okay, e-excuse me--
Flight attendant: Ma'am, please sit down!
Rachel: No, I'm sorry, I'm really sorry, but I need to get off the plane, okay? I needed to tell someone that I love them.
Flight attendant: Ma'am, I can't let you off the plane.
Ross: [listening to the conversation] Let her off the plane!!
Flight attendant: I am afraid you are gonna have to take a seat.
Rachel: Oh, please miss, you don't understand!
Ross: Try to understand!!
Rachel: Oh, come on, miss, isn't there any way that you could just let me off the-- [the message cuts before Rachel finishes her sentence]
Ross: No, no!! Oh, my god, did she get off the plane? Did she get off the plane?
Rachel: [coming into room] I got off the plane.
Ross: You got off the plane.
[they passionately make out]
Rachel: I do love you.
Ross: I love you, too, and I am never letting you go again.
Rachel: Okay, because this is where I want to be. Okay, no more of this, I don't wanna mess this up again.
Ross: Me either, okay, we are done being stupid.
Rachel: It's you and me, all right, this is it? You and me, this is it.
Ross : This is it. Unless we're on a break.
[awkward pause]
Ross: [to himself] Don't make jokes now...

Rachel: To Monica and Chandler! And that knocked-up girl in Ohio!

Rachel: You really think I didn't say goodbye to you because I don't care?
Ross: That's what it seemed like.
Rachel: I cannot believe that after ten years you do not know one thing about me!
Ross: Fine. Then why didn't you say something?
Rachel: Because it is too damn hard, Ross! I can't even begin to explain to you how much I am going to miss you. When I think about not seeing you every day, it makes me not want to go. Okay? So if you think I didn't say goodbye to you because you don't mean as much to me as everybody else, you're wrong. It's because you mean more to me. So there, all right? There's your goodbye.

Ross: Okay, awkward question, the hospital knows you took two, right?

Ross: Brussels sprouts? That's worse than no food!

Ross: Fajitas! Be careful. Very hot plate, very hot!
Rachel: Ross, you don't even have oven mitts on!
Ross: [laughs] That is gonna hurt tomorrow!

Ross: I don't get a goodbye?
Rachel: What?
Ross: Everyone gets a goodbye but me? What've I got to do to get a goodbye? Be best friends with you? Go out with you? Have a baby with you? Oh wait a minute, wait a minute, I did all those things!

Ross: Is Emma awake yet?
Rachel: It's still nap time. She'll be up soon.
Ross: Where's Joey?
Rachel: I said, it's still nap time.
[Joey awakes from his nap.]
Ross: There's Uncle Joey! Say something to Emma for her 18th birthday!
Joey: [starts to turn on his charm for the camera] 18, huh?
Ross: [switches off the camera] NO!
Joey: It's for her hot friends!
Ross: When they see this you'll be 52!
Joey: And starting to think about settling down!

Ross: We think Chandler might be having an affair.
Monica: What?
Rachel: Phoebe and I saw Chandler with a blonde woman today outside on the street, and then we followed them to a house in Westchester.
Phoebe: They went in together. I'm so sorry.
Monica: Oh, my... oh, my, that's awful... What did you think of the house?
Phoebe: What?
Joey: Monica, you understand what we're saying, right?
Monica: Yeah... sure... I'm... devastated, obviously!... Did you think the neighborhood was homey?
[Chandler enters]
Chandler: Hey!
Joey: You son of a bitch.
Chandler: Is it me, or have the greetings really gone downhill around here?

Ross: Well, if Phoebe's choosing, then say hello to Mike's next groomsman.
Chandler: Oh, I will! But I will need a mirror... as he is me!

Ross:Ah, love. L-O-V-E, love. L is for life. And what is life without love?
Rachel: [to Joey and Charlie] Oh my, are we supposed to answer?
Ross: O is for "oh, wow!" The V is for this very surprising turn of events, which I'm still fine with by the way. E is for how extremely normal I find it. That you two are together. And now one day you might get married and have children of your own.

[Joey and Chandler are discussing Joey's impending date with Rachel.]
Chandler: Wow, so tonight might be the night. You nervous?
Joey: Nah. This is the part I'm actually good at.
Chandler: What must it be like not to be crippled by fear and self-loathing?
Joey: It's okay!