Friends quotes
613 total quotesAll Seasons
Season 1
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Season 6
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Season 10
Chandler: You know, on second thought, gum would be perfection.
Jill Goodacre: [gives him a strange look and a stick of gum]
Chandler: [thinking] Gum would be perfection. Gum would be perfection. I could have said gum would be nice, could have said I'll have a stick. But no no no no no, for me, gum is perfection. I loathe myself.
Jill Goodacre: [gives him a strange look and a stick of gum]
Chandler: [thinking] Gum would be perfection. Gum would be perfection. I could have said gum would be nice, could have said I'll have a stick. But no no no no no, for me, gum is perfection. I loathe myself.
Chandler: You slept with someone three hours after you thought you broke up. I mean, bullets have left guns slower.
Chandler: You smoked.
Rachel: I did not.
Chandler: Yes you did. You look happy and sick-- you smoked!
Rachel: All right, fine, but I had to. I had to do it for my career.
Chandler: I wish I had to smoke for my career.
Rachel: I did not.
Chandler: Yes you did. You look happy and sick-- you smoked!
Rachel: All right, fine, but I had to. I had to do it for my career.
Chandler: I wish I had to smoke for my career.
Chandler: You're right, it is a ridiculous name!
Joey: It's not that bad.
Chandler: Yes, it is! From now on, I have no first name.
Joey: So you're just "Bing?"
Chandler: I have no name.
Joey: It's not that bad.
Chandler: Yes, it is! From now on, I have no first name.
Joey: So you're just "Bing?"
Chandler: I have no name.
Chandler: [about Joey's ceramic dog] So is he trained, or is he gonna leave little bathroom tiles all over the floor? Whoa-stay! Stay! Good fake dog.
Chandler: [after being told by everyone he makes a gay first impression even though he said "be vague about it"] So... what is it about me?
Monica: I don't know....You...you have a quality.
Everyone: Yeah. Absolutely. A quality.
Chandler: Oh, oh, a quality! Good, because I was worried you guys were gonna be vague about this.
Monica: I don't know....You...you have a quality.
Everyone: Yeah. Absolutely. A quality.
Chandler: Oh, oh, a quality! Good, because I was worried you guys were gonna be vague about this.
Chandler: [Preparing to break up with Janice for the third time] There's no easy way to say this. At least, there's no new way for me to say this.
Chandler: [sniffs] This sandwich does smell good...
Joey: Did I tell you to smell my sandwich?
Chandler: I can't smell your sandwich?
Joey: No! Half of the taste is in the smell! You're sucking up all the taste units!
Chandler: Okay, I'll give them back [exhales].
Joey: Did I tell you to smell my sandwich?
Chandler: I can't smell your sandwich?
Joey: No! Half of the taste is in the smell! You're sucking up all the taste units!
Chandler: Okay, I'll give them back [exhales].
Chandler:[To Monica] Come on, you're going to Bloomingdale's with Julie? That's like cheating on Rachel in her house of worship.
Chandler:Honey, we are so meant to be. Look, we both have copies of the 'Annie' soundtrack!
Monica:Honey? Both yours.
Monica:Honey? Both yours.
Chandler:[About Parker] Somewhere there is someone with a tranquilizer gun and a huge butterfly net looking for that man.
Danny: I had a really nice time tonight.
Rachel: So did I. I'm really glad Monica asked us out.
Rachel: So did I. I'm really glad Monica asked us out.
Doctor: You do know it's twins, right?
Chandler: Oh, yeah. These are the faces of two people in the know!
Chandler: Oh, yeah. These are the faces of two people in the know!
Dr. Green: [on the phone, which Rachel left on the counter] You never think of the consequences of your decisions!
Joey: [picks up the phone] Hey! I do too think about the consequences of my decisions... Well what gives you the right to- ... Go to hell!
[Joey hangs up the phone angrily]
Joey: Stupid guy on my phone.
Joey: [picks up the phone] Hey! I do too think about the consequences of my decisions... Well what gives you the right to- ... Go to hell!
[Joey hangs up the phone angrily]
Joey: Stupid guy on my phone.