Nip/Tuck quotes

349 total quotes



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Julia: Do you know the difference between God and a surgeon? God doesn't think he's a surgeon.

Kimber: Julia, Matt and I are in love. And I understand that becoming a grandmother brings up complicated feelings. But please don't make that our problem.
Julia: My eighteen-year-old son is having a child with a woman who happens to have slept with both of his fathers. There is nothing complicated about my feelings!

Liz: His-and-her facelifts. If this is indicative of the state of relationships in the 21st century, then I'm staying single.
Christian: And cocker spaniels all over south Florida howl in relief.

Liz: You can sing whatever song you want to in front of them (Sean and Christian), but I will not let your gay-shame cost me my job. You know, I thought having a woman run this place was gonna make a big difference, but with you it's all espresso machines and fresh carpeting, Michelle. I am still working for a dick!

Man at consult: The world we live in has a certain aesthetic, and you can't enjoy its privileges without conforming to a higher standard.

Matt: [upon seeing Christian and Sean with a Porsche] So whose turn is it to have a mid-life crisis?

Michelle: But it isn't just about him, Sean. What about my baggage?
Sean: He can handle it.
Michelle: But I don't know if I can.
Sean: So you use him, let him help you. He's strong.

Michelle: My sister and I used to make our own decorations. Popcorn, cotton balls for snow. Sometimes we'd take the tops off aluminum cans and punch holes through them, so the light could shine through.
Christian: From cans to crystals. You've come quite a long way, baby.
Michelle: I know, but I sorta miss making something from nothing, y'know? And the tree. We would wait til the last minute; pick up the bargain leftover. Sometimes the branches were half dead, but at least it was real.
Christian: So is this. [kisses her]

Mother of the mother-daughter duo in Christian's bedroom: Do you know what kind of women accept not being kissed? Whores. We're not whores.
Christian: No, you're the goddamn Mother of the Year.

Sean: [about Michelle] You love her, Christian.
Christian: I do love her. But I can't trust her. Apparently, you're the only person I can trust. Absolutely trust.

Sean: [after giving Matt sex advice] The neighbors will either move or send you flowers.
Matt: If that's what you did with her, I can't imagine what Christian and Kimber did together.

Sean: [referring to the ring he intends on giving to Julia] It's a little out of my range.
Christian: You banged the night nurse, Sean.
Sean: I'll take it.

Sean: [to Christian] Do you realize, between the two of us, that we've almost ruined a marriage and a business by sleeping with the wrong women this month?

Sean: [to Christian] I'm in awe of you, always have been.

Sean: [to Christian]] Have you ever had a baby that someone else didn't think was theirs?