Mr. Show quotes
217 total quotesMayor O.D. McCrack (unknown): As mayor of the altered state of Druggachusettes, I declare this pizza to be...awesome!
Moe Phelps (Bob): All acting is is jumping up and down and yelling and screaming a lot.
Moe Phelps (Bob): Pack your bags, gang. We're going up my mom's ass!
Season 4 (Oct. - Dec. 1998)
Season 4 (Oct. - Dec. 1998)
Mother of missing companion (Brett Paesel): We're praying for our boy. He's a wonderful son. And I'm sure a great companion. We also pray for the two young people.
Father of missing companion (Jay Johnston): And, of course, the other companion.
Father of missing companion (Jay Johnston): And, of course, the other companion.
NASA spokesman (David): We have the technology. The time is now. Science can wait no longer. Children are our future. America can, should, must, and will blow up the moon.
Panzic Poojaran (David): Everyday people go into restaurants, and they...they take the condiments, and they take them and put them on the plate and mix it up and put it in their glass and they dare their friends to drink it. They...they think it is funny. RIGHT NOW I WOULD DRINK IT! AND I WOULD THANK THEM FOR IT!
Panzic Poojaran (David): If I die ... if I die ... tell my people ... to bury me ... in mashed potatoes!
Paul Peters, spokesperson for Dr. X's telethon (unknown): Please don't kill me!
Professor Murder (Sam Sarpong): What?! I ain't no Professor Pickles!
Pickles, the ventriloquism dummy (Bob): Yeah, don't mess with the East Coast!
Professor Murder (Sam Sarpong): Look, I don't need you defending me, you Howdy-Doody-lookin' motherfucker. I'm outta here!
Pickles, the ventriloquism dummy (Bob): Yeah, I'm with him!
Professor Murder (Sam Sarpong): Man, step off!
Pickles, the ventriloquism dummy (Bob): Yeah, don't mess with the East Coast!
Professor Murder (Sam Sarpong): Look, I don't need you defending me, you Howdy-Doody-lookin' motherfucker. I'm outta here!
Pickles, the ventriloquism dummy (Bob): Yeah, I'm with him!
Professor Murder (Sam Sarpong): Man, step off!
Prospective Shoe Court Shoe Store employee (Bob): It was great. It's crack. It gets ya real high.
Reverend Winton Dupree (Bob): I have a question, and I know you all have it, too: What is up Satan's ass?! All he wants to do is fuck us up, the dick-licker! Now the Lord said, "I am the light of the world." Now, He could as easily have said, "I am King Shit of Fuck Mountain. Why would you fuck with Me?!" Now, I'll tell you what. I am the only preacher with the fuckin' balls, and you know this, you all know this, to say, "Satan I damn thee! You goddamm motherfuckin', shit-eatin', cock-suckin', son of a B!" Can I get a fuckin' A?