Mr. Show quotes

217 total quotes



All Seasons  Season 1   Season 2   Season 3  
Season 4
 



"Go-to" guy (Jay Johnston): Hey mom, could you pass the gravy?
"Go-to" guy's mom (unknown): That wasn't part of the deal!

Anthony "One Time" Branca (David): The both of youze can grab onto my books, mother-father, Chinese dentist.

Becky Thyre: Sorrow is the key that gets our tears out of eye jail.

Bob at 4 years old (unknown): Mommy, What's a Gagortion?

Bob: ... the Itty Bitty Tittie Committee.
David: Let's hear it for the IBTC. They work hard!

Bob: With our help, you'll laugh your sales right through the... roof!

Burgundy Loafe customer (David): You want me to shit in a box while I'm eating dinner?

Byron T. Lebockwith, Racist in the Year 3000 (David): Keep 'em comin', Gleep Glop...

Byron T. Lebockwith, Racist in the Year 3000 (David): My relatives didn't move here to be put out of work by some shifty-eyed, lazy, yellow-metal, China-bots!

Byron T. Lebockwith, Racist in the Year 3000 (David): You can't trust a man what's made of gas! Not you, Zaxon, you're one of the good ones. There's white people made of gas, you know what I mean.

Civil War Reenactment piece narrator (Jeff Goldblum): He dreamed of one day finding a box of money.

College friend watching underground video (Brian Posehn): No shit!

Cyrus ______ (David): Frame it, bury it, walk 20 paces away, dig it up in 15 years and teach the world to sing!

Cyrus ______ (David): Who dares question Ryan Dorn?!

David (as "himself"): You know, Jill's ingested so much soil, her stomach oughta be listed in the "Worm Apartment Guide"!