Charlie: Well yea we changed it. I thought you guys were changing it.
Dennis: It was always meant to be a bicep.
Charlie: Well why didn't you cut it like a...cause it totally looks like a dick. I thought well alright lets go with the dick thing, its more masculine anyway. I mean shit if you want it to be a bicep it needs more veins.

Charlie: Well, I taped over the Spin Doctors mix!

Charlie: You should have seen how passionate he got when I showed him the dick flyer.
Mac: You knew that it was a dick?!
With Mac  :Dennis: You knew?!

Dee (beating on a bum with a baton): You like that, bitch, huh? (She throws the bum into the trashcans, picks up a trashcan lid and starts bashing him over the head with it.) I am not your little pinup-girl for you to tug your rotten pecker at!
Bum: You crazy bitch! (Dee kicks him in the ass as he runs away from her.)
Dee: I don't wanna see you or your dirty balls in my alley again!

Dee (from inside the warehouse): It smells overwhelmingly like kerosene in here!
Frank: Uh-huh! (he tosses the match into the warehouse and runs)

Dee (furious): I can't believe you guys! I could have been killed!
Charlie: Well, somebody had to do it!
Mac: Yeah, those kittens were in a burning building, Deandra!
Dee: You set me on fire!
Frank': We set the building on fire, you just happened to catch on fire!
Mac: Just barely!
Frank: We put you out!
Charlie: Exactly! (Dee emerges from the building. As Frank is blasting her with the extinguisher, she throws the box of kittens to one side.)
Dee: Well, I do look kinda heroic--
Mac: What?! What are you talking about?! You threw the box of kittens!
Dee: I WAS ON FIRE!
Charlie (mimicking Dee): I was on fire!
Frank (annoyed): We gotta shoot this shit again!
Charlie (dismissively): Yeah, like fire hurts...

Dee I found the kittens! (Frank tosses something into the well and runs. Annoyed) Oh, come on! (Another explosion, and Dee starts screaming again.)
(Cut to the couch, where Frank, Mac and Charlie are watching the video.)

Dee: Ewww. Oh, I don't even know how that works, oh, God...

Dee: I have been taking this place up the butt with a little thing I like to call "Dee's Double-Drop."
Dennis: So you're doing the double-drop here too?
Dee: You know about that?
Dennis: Yeah, we always used to take the difference out of your purse.

Dee: I'm not asking you to do anything, just turn a blind eye while I rob this place stupid.

Dee: Oh, I'm sorry, I'm a lil preocupied with worrying about being killed by the mob because a homeless priest ran off with all of our drugs!

Dee: Those goddam North Koreans.
Dennis: They are some sneaky bastards.

Dee: Well, I just broke up with Kevin!
Mac: Dee, we're trying to practice!
Dee: I can't do it! I can't get it out of my head! I don't know if he's retarded or not, but I can't stop thinking about it!
Dennis: Dee, we're trying to have band practice here!
Dee: I mean, I was gonna ride this guy to the top, you know what I mean? He was gonna put me in one of his rap videos!
Dennis: Look, the guy's not retarded, okay?
(beat)
Dee: What?!
Dennis: Yeah, I was just saying that to mess with you.
Dee: Why? Why would you do something like that?
Dennis: I thought it'd be funny.
Dee: It's not funny! It's not funny at all! This guy's perfect for me, and you've gone and blown it! You've ruined everything! You are a bad, bad person.
(points at Dennis' jumpsuit)
Dee: Ewww, (trounces out)
Dennis: All right! Ready, guys?
Mac: So, that guy's not retarded?
Dennis: Oh no, he's totally retarded.

Dee: What about you, Dennis?
Dennis: Well I...
Frank: Dennis is a prostitute now.
Mac: Good.
Dennis: No, I'm not a prostitute, OK?
Frank: Yes, he is.
Dennis: There is no banging old ladies or dudes, all right? I will be providing a very important service, however, as what I would like to be called: a handsome companion.
Mac: To dudes?
Charlie: To guys or...
Dennis: No, not to dudes. No, hang on. Hold on. Hang on. To old fancy rich ladies who want to do classy, exotic, fancy things with me.
Mac: Great, Dennis, you keep banging dudes.

Dee: What is this thing?
Charlie: That's Dennis' prototype. Be careful with that.
Dee: No, I know it's the prototype but I don't get how it works.
Charlie: Dee, you're asking a million questions. All right, look, I'm just going to walk you through it, so pay attention. OK, look, the pretty lady gets naked, of course, and I help her into the prototype, yes? My hands sort of guiding along her body making sure that it fits properly. Now the dress is starting to look fantastic, you know? And she feels very excited, she feels very sensual and I feel very sensual about her because she looks so good. And then, you know, we chit-chat a little bit, no big deal but she asks me back to her place. Where did that come from? I accept, you know? And then we chit-chat at her place, it's no big deal, but eventually she says, "Do you want to make love, Charlie?"
Dee: Oh God.
Charlie: And I say, "Are you serious? Because yes, I do." And then just boom, we're into it and it's hot and it's passionate.
Dee: Charlie...
Charlie: And then it's just you and me babe...
Dee: Oh my God.