Alan: Where are Eric and Cory?
Shawn: They... went to the library.
Alan: You mean the public library, the one that closes at nine?
Shawn: Oh no, the other one.
Alan: I'm gonna take Morgan upstairs, and then you and I are gonna talk a little more.
Shawn: Like a relationship-building thing?
Alan: No. [goes upstairs]
Shawn: Wow. For the first time in my life, I'm in trouble with someone else's dad!

Alan: You know, Cor, when I was a kid, Christmas was about appreciating your gifts because they were given with love.
Cory: Oh, right. Glad that's over.

Amy: Cory, what did you do to your beautiful hair?
Cory: It wasn't beautiful, it looked like Velcro!
Eric: Nothing's gonna stick to that now, man.

Amy: When you're a kid, you see everything as right or wrong, black or white...
Eric: Blonde or brunette...

Cory: "I'm Blowin' Up Your Head, Part 6: Stumpy's Revenge" I thought Stumpy died in "Part 5."
Shawn: He did. That's why he wants revenge.

Cory: [before a test] I am so nervous!
Shawn: You? My palms are sweating so much I can't even read the answers I wrote on them!
Season 2

Cory: [reading attendance sheet] Lawrence, Topanga?
Topanga: [sitting on the floor on a pillow] I am channeling. I will only answer to the name of: [opens eyes] Oommmmmooooooowwwwwwooo!
Cory: Present... but not all here.

Cory: [referring to a baseball card] She paid $7 for it at a swap-meet.
Shawn: $7 in dog years: a Cal Ripkin rookie goes for $150 easy. Your grandmother must really love you.
Cory: Or she shot a man in Reno just to watch him die.
Shawn: You're kidding, aren't you?
Cory: I'm not sure.

Cory: [to Feeny] It's hard to imagine you as a kid. Did your parents call you Mr. Feeny?

Cory: Beautiful? I've seen hormones turn a normal guy's face into Craters 'R Us.

Cory: Dad, I need a job.
Alan: You need to be a kid.
Cory: I wanna be able to afford stuff!
Alan: So do I!

Cory: Friday, I love Friday. Soon I'm gonna be home for the whole weekend.
Amy: Friday, I hate Friday. Soon you're gonna be home for the whole weekend.
Cory: Oh, you love me.
Amy: Oh, you wish.

Cory: Hey, Mom, this cereal is bogus. Where's my blue sugar moons? Where're my yellow teddy bears? All this is, is hamster food and cornflake dust. Where's all the good stuff?
Amy: Morgan.
Cory: She took out all the good stuff.
Morgan: I've been up since 6 o' clock!
Amy: What is this? Sugar-coated... sugar?
Morgan: I'm feeling very perky!
Amy: Come on, Morgan, let's get you into bed.
Morgan: How come? How come? How come how come how come?
Amy: Because if we hurry we might just make it before the coma.
Morgan: Coma? Coma? Coma coma coma?
Alan: Don't waste this, honey, have her paint the house.

Cory: I'm second-string, Mr. Feeny.
Minkus: Hey, congratulations! Did you tell your dad?
Cory: No, I happen to like my dad.

Cory: Just last night your son was imprisoned in his room, forbidden to go to the movies with his best friends.
Alan: Our daughter didn't dial random numbers in Saskatchewan just to hear people "talk Canadian".