Al: Sarah, I'm not sure I want you to get married.
Sarah: Why not?
Al: [hugging Clair] Well I lost one girl, already. I'm not sure I'm ready to lose another.
Cliff: Well you can have that one back if you want.

Al: Sarah, I'm not sure I want you to get married.
Sarah: Why not?
Al: [hugging Clair] Well I lost one girl, already. I'm not sure I'm ready to lose another.
Cliff: Well you can have that one back if you want.

Anna: (to Denise about choosing a college) You go where you want to go, or you'll have to answer to me!
Season 3

Anna: (to Denise about choosing a college) You go where you want to go, or you'll have to answer to me!
Season 3

Clair (to Cliff about the Mega Dolls): Theres a whole family of them. There's "Mega Girl," "Mega Boy," she's married to "Mega Man" and they all drive around all day in "The Mega Mobile."

Clair (to Cliff about the Mega Dolls): Theres a whole family of them. There's "Mega Girl," "Mega Boy," she's married to "Mega Man" and they all drive around all day in "The Mega Mobile."

Clair: [about gardening] If this is so lovely, how come you're not down here giving me a hand?
Cliff: Because that's dirt.
Clair: No, to you it's dirt. To me, it's life.
Cliff: Ha ha. Then why is it that you get upset when the children track life into the house?

Clair: [about gardening] If this is so lovely, how come you're not down here giving me a hand?
Cliff: Because that's dirt.
Clair: No, to you it's dirt. To me, it's life.
Cliff: Ha ha. Then why is it that you get upset when the children track life into the house?

Clair: [as Amanda] Welcome to Amanda's Furniture City! Where money talks and nobody walks. If you like it you touch it, if you break it you buy it. If you don't see it we don't have it but we will get it. Now what can I do for you?
...
Clair: You are in luck! Because here at Furniture City, we accept all major credit cards.
Theo: I don't have any of those.
Amanda: You are in luck! Because here at Furniture City, we accept personal checks.
Theo: I don't have any personal checks.
Amanda: Then you are about to leave Furniture City!
Theo: Mom!
Cockroach: That's Amanda!
Theo: Cockroach!
Cockroach: That's Mr. Dansbury to you!

Clair: [as Amanda] Welcome to Amanda's Furniture City! Where money talks and nobody walks. If you like it you touch it, if you break it you buy it. If you don't see it we don't have it but we will get it. Now what can I do for you?
...
Clair: You are in luck! Because here at Furniture City, we accept all major credit cards.
Theo: I don't have any of those.
Amanda: You are in luck! Because here at Furniture City, we accept personal checks.
Theo: I don't have any personal checks.
Amanda: Then you are about to leave Furniture City!
Theo: Mom!
Cockroach: That's Amanda!
Theo: Cockroach!
Cockroach: That's Mr. Dansbury to you!

Clair: [whispers] Rudy, come here, quick! Rudy, do you see that guy over there?
Rudy: Daddy?
Clair: Listen, I want you to go over there and tell him that you heard that I thought he was cute.
Rudy: [goes over to Cliff] Mommy said that she heard that she thinks you're cute.
Cliff: Who?
Rudy: Mommy!
Cliff: Mommy said that she heard that she thinks she's cute?
Rudy: You!
Cliff: You tell her that I think that she is allllllriiiiight! [Cliff stops Rudy] Wait, wait, wait, come back here a minute. But don't tell her that I said it. You tell her that you heard that I might have said it.
[Rudy nods and goes to Clair]
Rudy: Daddy said that he might heard that you are goooooourgest!
Clair: I want you to go back and tell him that you thought you heard that I would like to go out on a date with him Saturday night at 12:05.
Rudy: [to Cliff] Mommy said that she heard that she would like to go on a date with you at three-oh-oh.
Cliff: Tell her that at 0300, the leukocytes will take over all of the minejectnofields and that I will kiss her on the steps of the Theresa hotel.
Rudy: [to Clair] He said a zeuklomax and a zuklomax may bo and she wants, uh he wants to meet you on the steps of the hotel-of-something.
Clair: Now...
Rudy: No no no, come on. [leads Clair over to Cliff]
Cliff: What did she say?
Rudy: No no no!
Cliff: She said no?

Clair: [whispers] Rudy, come here, quick! Rudy, do you see that guy over there?
Rudy: Daddy?
Clair: Listen, I want you to go over there and tell him that you heard that I thought he was cute.
Rudy: [goes over to Cliff] Mommy said that she heard that she thinks you're cute.
Cliff: Who?
Rudy: Mommy!
Cliff: Mommy said that she heard that she thinks she's cute?
Rudy: You!
Cliff: You tell her that I think that she is allllllriiiiight! [Cliff stops Rudy] Wait, wait, wait, come back here a minute. But don't tell her that I said it. You tell her that you heard that I might have said it.
[Rudy nods and goes to Clair]
Rudy: Daddy said that he might heard that you are goooooourgest!
Clair: I want you to go back and tell him that you thought you heard that I would like to go out on a date with him Saturday night at 12:05.
Rudy: [to Cliff] Mommy said that she heard that she would like to go on a date with you at three-oh-oh.
Cliff: Tell her that at 0300, the leukocytes will take over all of the minejectnofields and that I will kiss her on the steps of the Theresa hotel.
Rudy: [to Clair] He said a zeuklomax and a zuklomax may bo and she wants, uh he wants to meet you on the steps of the hotel-of-something.
Clair: Now...
Rudy: No no no, come on. [leads Clair over to Cliff]
Cliff: What did she say?
Rudy: No no no!
Cliff: She said no?

Clair: Appliances can be hard to resist sometimes. They're shiny, they make weird noises, they have those buttons that light up. That's why your father likes them!

Clair: Appliances can be hard to resist sometimes. They're shiny, they make weird noises, they have those buttons that light up. That's why your father likes them!

Clair: Cliff, do you want to be 19 again?
Cliff: Only if you'll be 19 with me.
Clair: Sure.
Cliff: And the kids can be 49.