Mr. Show quotes
217 total quotesGlenn Petersen, phone sex guru (Bob): You're just jealous because I'm more of a woman than you'll ever be!
Hypnotherapist (Becky Thyre): What are you doing in the cemetery, Charles?
Charles ______ (David): I just wanna dig up a corpse and have sexual relations with it!
Charles ______ (David): I just wanna dig up a corpse and have sexual relations with it!
Incompetent kidnapper (Bob): One...thousand dollars if you ever want to see my toe again.
Jonathan, blind girl's friend (Bob): Well, then if you're blind, how do you know I'm a ... homosexual?
Lane Wellesby, actor trainer and handler (John Ennis): There's a reason for the phrase, "as dumb as an actor".
Larry Branson (Bob): Maybe he wasn't such a chicken-shit after all ... Bartender? ... My life!
Larry Kleist, rapist (Bob): Hello, Larry is my name. Insurance is my game. Raping was another game of mine...
Larry Turnauer, a.k.a. Marilyn Monster (David): And don't forget to break some rules. But... Don't break any rules.
Miscellaneous Quotes
Miscellaneous Quotes
Lucian, He Who Watches All of Television (unknown): The irony's as bittersweet as...tears on Turkish Delight!