M*A*S*H quotes
576 total quotesFrank (dictating his will): To Major Margaret Houlihan... my friend... my comrade... my little soldier...I leave all my clothes.
Frank (into walkie-talkie): Attention all Allied personnel: There are only about half a dozen stars visible, sky-wise: I am directly under the brightest one.
Hawkeye: Very good, Frank.
BJ: They'll start looking for us in Bethlehem.
Hawkeye: Very good, Frank.
BJ: They'll start looking for us in Bethlehem.
Frank: "Funny thing, war - Never have so many suffered so much, so, so few could be so happy!!"
Margaret: "We're lucky to be two of the few and not the many."
Frank: "I know, darling, and I love being both of us."
Margaret: "We're lucky to be two of the few and not the many."
Frank: "I know, darling, and I love being both of us."
Frank: [After entering the Swamp] Pigpen. Brothel!
Hawkeye: Here, sir!
Trapper: Yo!
Hawkeye: Here, sir!
Trapper: Yo!
Frank: [in Henry's office] What if the Minutemen in 1776, on their way to Lexington and Concord, had stopped to worry about . . . toilet paper?!
Hawkeye: So we would have had independence 10 minutes later.
Hawkeye: So we would have had independence 10 minutes later.
Frank: [to Klinger] The next time I see you, I wanna see a shine on those high heels!
Frank: Another week of command and I'd have had you out of that dress!
Klinger: I'm not that easy.
Klinger: I'm not that easy.
Frank: As adjutant and assistant chief surgeon, I'd like to volunteer for that operation.
Margaret: How splendid, Major.
Henry: Very good, Frank.
Trapper: Lovely.
Hawkeye: Then it's settled. We'll do a hysterectomy on Major Burns.
Margaret: How splendid, Major.
Henry: Very good, Frank.
Trapper: Lovely.
Hawkeye: Then it's settled. We'll do a hysterectomy on Major Burns.
Frank: Colonel, you are not listening to me!
Henry: Uh, you'll have to speak a little louder, Frank. I'm not listening to you.
Henry: Uh, you'll have to speak a little louder, Frank. I'm not listening to you.
Frank: Hello? Louise, it's me, Frank.
Radar (Whispering to Frank): Frank Burns.
Frank (To Louise): Frank Burns.
Radar (Whispering to Frank): Frank Burns.
Frank (To Louise): Frank Burns.
Frank: I assure you, all goldbricking that went on here under Colonel Blake is going to stop. Under my command, life is going to be a different kettle of fish.
Radar: Are you sure you're in the right branch of the service Sir?
Radar: Are you sure you're in the right branch of the service Sir?