Nate: What about her?
Serena: Well, something happened the night of the Shepards' wedding.
Blair: I think we're all aware of what happened that night.
Serena: No, something else. Something I've tried to escape but Georgina won't let me. And now she's blackmailing me.
Nate: [shocked] Blackmailing you?
Chuck: With what, exactly?
Serena: Well, it started when Blair thought you and I had too much to drink. She told us to get some air, go outside, sober up.
[FLASHBACK - In the bar with Nate at the Shepards' Wedding]
Serena: If the happy couple didn't want the cashier for the premium bar, they should have made it BYOB.
[PRESENT]
Serena: Instead, we ended up in the bar and I opened that bottle of champagne and we... well...
Blair: We can skip that part, okay?
Chuck: Go ahead, I'll fill her in later.
Serena: I left in a hurry. I felt so terrible, so guilty for what I'd just done. I just... I had to get out of there.
[FLASHBACK - Serena calling for a cab]
Serena: [to the cab driver] East Hill Hotel, please.
[PRESENT]
Serena: Georgina and I had plans to meet up after, so I headed straight to her... little did I know, she had a surprise waiting for me.

Roman: Eleanor, we've been friends for a long time. Since before Marc Jacobs went into rehab.
Eleanor: Friends don't steal other friends' husbands.

Rufus: Guess whose dad is cool?!
Jenny: It's a trick question.
Dan: Yeah, 'cause it can't be ours.
Rufus: Ha ha, ha ha. Look at this: [He hands Dan a magazine]
Dan: Top Ten Forgotten Bands of the '90's.
Rufus: Yeah, check out who is number nine.
Jenny: He's very proud.
Dan: Hey. Hey, way to be forgotten!
Rufus: But that's how you get remembered!

Rufus: I dated a girl like Serena, once. Actually, a lot like Serena. And girls like that might be challenging. That's true. And they're complicated, and enigmatic. And usually worth it. And the only way you know for sure is to jump it with both feet.
Dan: What happened with you?
Rufus: I swam for a while. Till I drowned.
Dan: Oh. Well, thanks, dad. That's a great story.

Rufus: I need to know how you and Jenny would feel if I went out tonight, for a drink...with a woman.
Dan: Well, I guess I'd feel like you shouldn't wear that shirt or there will not be a second date.
Rufus: Really?
Dan: Really, really.
Rufus: Thanks. Now I guess I just have to worry about Jenny then.
[Jenny comes in]
Dan: Good morning.
Jenny: Hi.
Rufus: Good morning sunshine!
Jenny: Dad. Where'd you get that shirt?
Rufus: What's wrong with this shirt?
Jenny: Nothing, as long as you don't plan to wear it out of the house.
Dan: Worse. He plans on wearing on a date.
Rufus: For drinks, if that's okay.
Jenny: Whatever.

Rufus: Since when were you the patron saint of former rock stars?
Lily: Since when were you a rock star?

Rufus: So, you're not overreacting per se. You're just having a reaction that is so above and beyond what is appropriate.
Alison: I have been killing myself, trying to make up for what happened in Hudson.
Rufus: Which is not an overreaction, I might add.
Alison: And then I find out that the two of you are making out at a party.
Lily: Uh, it was hardly making out. And there's an explanation.

Serena: And you really expect me to believe this isn't all about revenge on Chuck?
Blair: Revenge is so 12 hours ago! And just because Marcus is the perfect post-Bass palate cleanser doesn't mean he isn't a delicious dish in his own right!

Serena: Are you here for another catfight?
[Blair pulls an envelope out of her purse]
Serena: What's that?
Blair: A letter. I wrote it to you when you were away at boarding school. I never sent it. [She begins to read it] Dear Serena. My world is falling apart and you're the only one who would understand. My father left my mother for a 31 year-old model. A male model [She scoffs]. I feel like screaming because I don't have anyone to talk to. You're gone, my dad's gone, Nate's acting weird... where are you? [Crying] Why don't you call? Why did you leave without saying goodbye? You're supposed to be my best friend. I miss you so much. Love, Blair.
Serena: [Tearing up, she trys to regain her composure] Why didn't you send it? I would've
Blair: You would've what? You knew, Serena. And you didn't even call.
Serena: I didn't know what to say to you, or even how to be your friend after what I did. [She also begins to cry] I'm so sorry.
Gossip Girl: Spotted in Central Park. Two white flags waving. Could an Upper East Side peace accord be that far off? So what will it be? Truce or consequences? We all know one nation can't have two queens. What happens next ? Only time will tell. XOXO, Gossip Girl.

Serena: Are you sure you didn't want any of my dinner? Your entrée was so small.
Dan: No no, it was amazing. I didn't realize fish could be creamed.

Serena: B, I say this out of love. But you being a bitch is what got dairy in your hair in the first place, okay? Be nice and neutral and things will swing back to normal. You're the Queen Bee, just let nature take its course.

Serena: Because I would rather Dan think I cheated on him than know what I really did.
Nate: What you really did?

Serena: Blair Waldorf, a fling? You're not exactly low maintenance.

Serena: Blair will never forgive you for what you did to her.
Chuck: Who told you that little piece of advice, your boyfriend Nate?
Serena: Nate didn't say anything ...
Chuck: Good. I don't think it's wise taking relationship advice from someone in a FAKE relationship. Call me crazy. [pause] Enjoy another night alone with your thoughts.
Serena: Good luck on your suicide mission!

Serena: Blair, stop. You can talk to me.
Blair: [Crying] We ended it. I wanted to tell you, but a part of me thought that if I didn't say it out loud, then it wouldn't be true. It was my birthday wish for us to get back together, but now, I think it's really over.