Boston Legal quotes
442 total quotesShirley: I am a senior partner here.
Jeffrey: You say that like it can get you laid. It can.
Jeffrey: You say that like it can get you laid. It can.
Shirley: When you came here I made one request, Jeffrey. One simple request, "Don't step on toes." Silly me for not adding, "Don't punch jaws."
Shirley: You do realize that I am significantly older than you are.
Jeffrey: Then be my significantly older other.
Jeffrey: Then be my significantly older other.
Shirley: Your Honor, Mr. Tiggs has a history of ruining women's lives. There's one out there right now. It's going to take her years to get over this.
Ivan: No, she'll get over me, she's like a goldfish. She has a three second memory.
Ivan: No, she'll get over me, she's like a goldfish. She has a three second memory.
Shirley: [to Alan] This was one of Edwin Poole's cases. Somehow it managed to slip through my cracks, so I was sure you'd find it especially tasty.
Shirley: [during closing arguments in court] I'm simply saying that we, as a people, as a nation, like to feel pretty. It's who we are. And if it means a few young rabbits have to sacrifice their lives, well, they and their families can take heart because they did so for their country. Because, when you think about it, all we really hope for at this point is to save face.
Vanessa Walker: I only have two plane tickets
Denny: Oh, gee, and I only have a Gulfstream.
Denny: Oh, gee, and I only have a Gulfstream.
Vanessa: I'm sure it's a long, very complicated answer, but what is your problem?
Alan: [chuckles] You're right. It's a long...very complicated answer.
Alan: [chuckles] You're right. It's a long...very complicated answer.
White Supremacist Twins: [singing] Michael rowed the boat ashore...Hallelujah! Michael rowed the boat ashore...
Alan: You do know that Michael was a homosexual Jew from Mexico, right?
Alan: You do know that Michael was a homosexual Jew from Mexico, right?
[About Gracie Jane]
Paul: Denny, you have got to gag this woman.
Denny: I would love to.
Paul: Denny, you have got to gag this woman.
Denny: I would love to.
[about Gracie Jane]
Paul: My God, we need to gag this woman.
Denny: I did once. Best sexual experience of my life.
Paul: My God, we need to gag this woman.
Denny: I did once. Best sexual experience of my life.
[About Judge Hooper]
Denise: You sure it was the husband?
Lincoln: I am. He drives some sort of little white convertible in an attempt, I suppose, to seem interesting, which he's not. Not at all. He's a nasty little man. He made her get that restraining order against me. He made her do it.
Denise: Well, you are a Peeping Tom.
Lincoln: She liked that. She liked that I looked. I was a benign peepy.
Denise: You sure it was the husband?
Lincoln: I am. He drives some sort of little white convertible in an attempt, I suppose, to seem interesting, which he's not. Not at all. He's a nasty little man. He made her get that restraining order against me. He made her do it.
Denise: Well, you are a Peeping Tom.
Lincoln: She liked that. She liked that I looked. I was a benign peepy.
[After Alan loses the wrestling match to Denny]
Shirley: Five seconds?
Alan: He cheated. You can't squat on the head.
Shirley: Five seconds?
Alan: Four, actually.
Shirley: Five seconds?
Alan: He cheated. You can't squat on the head.
Shirley: Five seconds?
Alan: Four, actually.
[after Melissa catches Marlene having sex with Alan]
Marlene: If you like to watch... I'm okay with that.
Marlene: If you like to watch... I'm okay with that.