Torchwood quotes
257 total quotesJack: Ianto! We're having a baby.
Ianto: Congratulations. Is now a good time to tell you I lost the car?
Jack: You did what?!
Ianto: Congratulations. Is now a good time to tell you I lost the car?
Jack: You did what?!
Jack: Ianto, how many people have we given amnesia pills to?
Ianto: Two thousand and eight.
Owen: Hey, what if they all become psychotic?
Tosh: Do you have to sound so happy?
Owen: Yeah, I'm just saying, Mean Streets!
Ianto: Two thousand and eight.
Owen: Hey, what if they all become psychotic?
Tosh: Do you have to sound so happy?
Owen: Yeah, I'm just saying, Mean Streets!
Jack: Ianto, with me. I need your local knowledge.
Gwen: Oh, is that what you're calling it these days?
Gwen: Oh, is that what you're calling it these days?
Jack: Looks like we're going to have to go through every drawer, bin and plant-pot.
Ianto: Right, OK. I'll do this floor, don't want you getting over excited. You take the roof, you're good on roofs.
[Pause. Jack starts to leave]
Ianto: Jack? Why are we helping him?
Jack: He's a reminder of my past, I want him gone.
[Beat]
Jack: By the way, was that a yes?
Ianto: Yes, yes...
Ianto: Right, OK. I'll do this floor, don't want you getting over excited. You take the roof, you're good on roofs.
[Pause. Jack starts to leave]
Ianto: Jack? Why are we helping him?
Jack: He's a reminder of my past, I want him gone.
[Beat]
Jack: By the way, was that a yes?
Ianto: Yes, yes...
Jack: Now I have to help you all go back. Find a memory that defines you, rediscover who you are. If I'm wrong, he will still be here when we've done this. [turns off computer screen] Let me take you back to before we all met. [turns off lights] Feel around for anything that makes you what you are. The hidden and the forgotten. Tell me where you are.
Gwen: College canteen. Rhys is sitting opposite me telling stupid jokes.
[Flashback] - :Rhys: where do you find a tortoise with no legs? Where you left it!
Owen: It's my birthday, ten. My mum spends the whole day screaming, ‘I love you because you're my son but that doesn't mean I have to like you.'
Tosh: Maths club. There's something so reliable about maths. Always the right answer.
Ianto: Meeting Lisa. Falling in love. I never felt so alive.
Owen: Turned sixteen, she packs my bags. That is the nicest thing you've done for me in years mother.
Gwen: Kissing in the supermarket. The look on his face.
Tosh: My first flat. I don't have a flat warming � there's no one I want to invite.
Ianto: Losing Lisa. Like the world had ended.
Gwen: The way he looks at me sometimes, as if he's scared of what he feels for me. I love him [turns to Jack] but not in the way I love you.
Jack: [to Gwen] Take this [Gwen takes the retcon pill]
Tosh: Knowing there has to be more to life than this, knowing I'm special, waiting for someone to see it.
Jack: I saw it [gives her a pill]
Owen: You save one life, a hundred lives but it's never enough. Who will save me?
Jack: I will [gives him a pill]
Ianto: Coming here, it gave me meaning again. [Turns to Jack] You. [Jack kisses his forehead then gives him a pill]
Jack: [to everyone] You each have a short-term amnesia pill. It will make you forget Adam. We have to wipe out the last 48 hours from our memories. Go back to who we were.
[Ianto takes his pill]
[Cut to Adam in his cell]
[Gwen takes her pill]
[Cut to Adam in his cell]
[Owen takes his pill]
Tosh: [Switches the screen on to look at Adam in his cell] I'm going to lose so much.
Jack: None of it was real.
Tosh: He loved me and I loved him. It's no different from real memories.
Jack: He forced it on you. You have to let it go
Tosh: [Takes her pill, then looks at the screen] Goodbye Adam.
Gwen: College canteen. Rhys is sitting opposite me telling stupid jokes.
[Flashback] - :Rhys: where do you find a tortoise with no legs? Where you left it!
Owen: It's my birthday, ten. My mum spends the whole day screaming, ‘I love you because you're my son but that doesn't mean I have to like you.'
Tosh: Maths club. There's something so reliable about maths. Always the right answer.
Ianto: Meeting Lisa. Falling in love. I never felt so alive.
Owen: Turned sixteen, she packs my bags. That is the nicest thing you've done for me in years mother.
Gwen: Kissing in the supermarket. The look on his face.
Tosh: My first flat. I don't have a flat warming � there's no one I want to invite.
Ianto: Losing Lisa. Like the world had ended.
Gwen: The way he looks at me sometimes, as if he's scared of what he feels for me. I love him [turns to Jack] but not in the way I love you.
Jack: [to Gwen] Take this [Gwen takes the retcon pill]
Tosh: Knowing there has to be more to life than this, knowing I'm special, waiting for someone to see it.
Jack: I saw it [gives her a pill]
Owen: You save one life, a hundred lives but it's never enough. Who will save me?
Jack: I will [gives him a pill]
Ianto: Coming here, it gave me meaning again. [Turns to Jack] You. [Jack kisses his forehead then gives him a pill]
Jack: [to everyone] You each have a short-term amnesia pill. It will make you forget Adam. We have to wipe out the last 48 hours from our memories. Go back to who we were.
[Ianto takes his pill]
[Cut to Adam in his cell]
[Gwen takes her pill]
[Cut to Adam in his cell]
[Owen takes his pill]
Tosh: [Switches the screen on to look at Adam in his cell] I'm going to lose so much.
Jack: None of it was real.
Tosh: He loved me and I loved him. It's no different from real memories.
Jack: He forced it on you. You have to let it go
Tosh: [Takes her pill, then looks at the screen] Goodbye Adam.
Jack: Oh yeah, I love that office-y feel. I always get excited in these places. To me they're exotic. Office romances... Photocopying your butt, well maybe not your butt, although whilst we're here why don't we photo-
Ianto: The rift was active at these coordinates, approximately 200 feet above ground. That means this floor or the roof.
Jack: How are you, Ianto?
Ianto: All the better for having you back, Sir.
Jack: Can we drop the 'Sir' now? I mean, while I was away, I was thinking, maybe we could...You know, when this is all done...Dinner, a movie...?
Ianto: Are you asking me out on a date?
Jack: Interested?
Ianto: [stuttering] Well, as long as it's not in an office...Some fetishes should be kept to yourself.
Ianto: The rift was active at these coordinates, approximately 200 feet above ground. That means this floor or the roof.
Jack: How are you, Ianto?
Ianto: All the better for having you back, Sir.
Jack: Can we drop the 'Sir' now? I mean, while I was away, I was thinking, maybe we could...You know, when this is all done...Dinner, a movie...?
Ianto: Are you asking me out on a date?
Jack: Interested?
Ianto: [stuttering] Well, as long as it's not in an office...Some fetishes should be kept to yourself.
Jack: Oh, by the way, I found your diary.
Ianto: Ah, yes, I've been looking for that. [starts to walk away]
Jack: And for the record, measuring tapes never lie.
Ianto: [quietly] Fuck.
Ianto: Ah, yes, I've been looking for that. [starts to walk away]
Jack: And for the record, measuring tapes never lie.
Ianto: [quietly] Fuck.
Jack: Once, just once, I'd like to walk into one of these tents and find it's a party, with food, and drink, and dancing; a girl crying in the corner.
Jack: Silent types? That's okay. I used to date a guy with no mouth. Surprisingly creative.
Jack: There you go! I can taste it! Oestrogen. Definitely oestrogen. Take the pill, flush it away, it enters the water cycle. Feminizes the fish. Goes all the way up into the sky then falls all the way back down onto me. Contraceptives in the rain. Love this planet. Still, at least I won't get pregnant. Never doing that again.