The Muppet Show quotes

172 total quotes



All Seasons
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- Good. Can we please stop coming now?
- I can't believe those rats were responsible for this show.

- Here. Can you tell anything about me from this?
- Yeah, you've got a round shape, and you're full of hot air.
- [balloon slips out of Waldorf's fingers and whirls around losing air]
- Boo boo!

- Hey, you old fool! You slept through the show.
- Who's a fool? You watched it.
- Well, Waldorf, they finally made it to Broadway.

- How do we watch it?
- Why do we watch it?
- [to the viewer] Why do you watch it?
- Have you ever thought there must be a life after death?

- How should we know how to get to Sesame Street?
- We don't even know how to get out of this stupid theater box!
- Do you think this show is educational?

- How?
- With the ending closer to the beginning!
- I thought for once the show really caught fire.

- I don't believe you!
- I think that number raises a pertinent question.

- I don't know. I never get up that early.
- You know, I really liked that.

- I don't know. Maybe somebody must have broken their ig.
- This show's speeding along very quickly this evening.

- I guess we'll never know
- It's like a kind of torture...
- (in unison) ...to have to watch this show!
- Fozzie- And tonight, I'm going to try and put something new in my act

- I liked it!
- Ugh! You?! Uuuugh! (Bangs head on balcony edge three times) YOU... LIKED... THAT?!
- No... I just wanted to see what you did if I said I did.
- That seemed like something very different.

- I love French fries.
- French fries? I don't get that.
- You didn't order any!
- You know, I'm really gonna enjoy tonight.

- I should say so. So many of these songs are long and boring.
- Yes, they finally managed one short and boring!
- Does that mean they're getting better or worse?
- You know something? That was a sweet number.

- I thought it burned itself out, same as always!
- Finally, we've seen them do a good show.

- I thought it was dumb.
- Maybe you're right.
- [sings] You are my sunshine, my only sunshine...