The Mentalist quotes

453 total quotes



All Seasons
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Jane: Catching killers I enjoy, but being reminded that we're just a cog in a petty, fascist machine? That is a little depressing.
Lisbon: Crime fighting is hard. Suck it up.

Jane: Disappointing, Lisbon. I thought you might push back a little. The guy called me a circus act.
Lisbon: Hey, the man is grieving. You push back.
Jane: Okay, I will.
Lisbon: [stops him by placing her hand on his chest] Don't you dare.
Jane: You said that I could.
Lisbon: I take it back.

Jane: Do I detect a slight residue of grumpiness in you demeanor?
Lisbon: No.
Jane: I swear to you, Lisbon, your gift is on its way.
Lisbon: I am not grumpy and I don't give a damn about your supposed gift.
Jane: [To Rigsby] She's still grumpy with me, isn't she?
Rigsby: Not touching that.

Jane: Do you always follow your husband's lead? Do you never struggle against his desire to control?
Mr. Plaskett: Excuse me?
Jane: Just because you drink too much doesn't mean you don't have a say. I should think he's at least half the reason you drink in the first place. Yeah? A good man, but cold, pious.
Mr. Plaskett: You know, possession of that badge does not excuse you from acting with human decency.

Jane: Don't be wistful, Lisbon. Greg was never the right man for you.
Lisbon: I'm not wistful! And no, he wasn't.
Jane: You're far too intense and particular for a man like that.
Lisbon: Excuse me? Intense and particular? What is that supposed to mean?
Jane: Well, they're good things.
Lisbon: In what ways am I intense and particular?
Jane: Oh, please.
Lisbon: Tell me.
Jane: Well, what ever happened to that guy from narcotics?
Lisbon: Jeff?
Jane: Jeff.
Lisbon: Oh, he bit his nails.
Jane: See, that's particular.
Lisbon: That is not being particular, it's a disgusting habit!
Jane: There's intense.

Jane: Eighteen years of secret anger. How did you stand it?
Muriel Renfrew: Nobody's life is perfect.

Jane: Excuse me, what kind of tree is this?
Chief Brody: Couldn't say.
Jane: Smells good. So you're not a local?
Chief Brody: Born five miles down the road, just don't give a crap about trees.

Jane: Fooled you, I could fool him.
Lisbon: Yeah, you fooled me. Alright, well done.
Jane: Yeah... Well, I'm sorry.
Lisbon: I tried calling. I tried calling you hundreds of times, begging you to talk to me, begging you to get help. Not a reply, not a word, not a text.
Jane: Sorry.
Lisbon: You know what? I've not been sleeping, I have not- Forget it, never mind. You know, you're a jerk. And your plan, it's not even a plan.
Jane: But you will help me?
Lisbon: What am I supposed to say? No? God, you're despicable!

Jane: Good luck Teresa, I love you.

Jane: Grace, personal question. Rigsby and I were wondering, uh...who is this man you were kissing by the coffee cart?
Grace: That's...that's none of your business.
Jane: Not from payroll?
Grace: Payroll? No, he doesn't even work here. It's none of your business.
Jane: Well, thank heavens for that, at least. No killing needed.
Rigsby: Don't be so sure.
Jane: You'll see. Honesty's best.
Rigsby: Yeah, honestly, I'd like to kick your butt right now.

Jane: Have you ever seen your mother naked?

Jane: Hey, thanks for not telling I made you take the case. Lisbon? Hello?
Lisbon: Tell me the truth.
Jane: Truth. Darth Vader? Luke's father.

Jane: Holding something of James' would help me pick up a feel for him. Get a sense of his being.
Mrs. Medina: Okay. Excuse me. [She leaves the room]
Jane: Thank you.
Lisbon: "Sense of his being"? What are you playing at?
Jane: Just go with it. I have to practice this touchy-feely stuff. It's been a while.
Lisbon: You're not gonna be blind forever.
Jane: No, right. Because bad stuff like this doesn't happen nearly as often as people think it does.

Jane: Horrible job you found for yourself, Kathryn. Helping a greedy egotist snatch up beautiful things he has no ability to appreciate.

Jane: Hypnosis is just a way to connect to the imagination rather than the conscious mind. The mind will accept whatever the imagination creates, however bizarre.
Lisbon: Hypnotism is what you use against my explicit orders to get witnesses to tell the truth. It's a little different than convincing somebody that a dead girl is a sack of vegetables.
Jane: Different in scale.