The Golden Girls quotes
465 total quotesDorothy: Ma, what are you doing!?
Sophia: [caught sneaking Bridget's meal] It's a little habit I picked up, I call it eating.
Sophia: [caught sneaking Bridget's meal] It's a little habit I picked up, I call it eating.
Dorothy: Ma, where are you going?
Sophia: To throw some holy water on her [Mrs. Claxton]. If she spits up pea soup and her head spins around, we're in big trouble!
Sophia: To throw some holy water on her [Mrs. Claxton]. If she spits up pea soup and her head spins around, we're in big trouble!
Dorothy: Ma, you can't sleep either?
Sophia: No, I'm sleeping so good I thought I'd come try it in the sink.
Sophia: No, I'm sleeping so good I thought I'd come try it in the sink.
Dorothy: Margaret, uh, please sit down.
Blanche: Maybe we oughta get her a booster seat.
Dorothy: [to Margaret] Can I get you a drink?
Blanche: How 'bout chocolate milk?
Rose: [sitting down next to Margaret] So, Margaret, you're from Atlanta.
Margaret: Well that's right.
Blanche: That child over there is trying to steal my daddy away. She ain't better but a tick on a slow moving hound dog.
Dorothy: Why is everyone around here talking like Burl Ives?
Blanche: Maybe we oughta get her a booster seat.
Dorothy: [to Margaret] Can I get you a drink?
Blanche: How 'bout chocolate milk?
Rose: [sitting down next to Margaret] So, Margaret, you're from Atlanta.
Margaret: Well that's right.
Blanche: That child over there is trying to steal my daddy away. She ain't better but a tick on a slow moving hound dog.
Dorothy: Why is everyone around here talking like Burl Ives?
Dorothy: Merry Christmas, Rose. Merry Christmas, Blanche.
Rose: Merry Christmas Dorothy, Merry Christmas Blanche.
Blanche: Merry Christmas Rose--
Sophia: What the hell is this, The Waltons?
Rose: Merry Christmas Dorothy, Merry Christmas Blanche.
Blanche: Merry Christmas Rose--
Sophia: What the hell is this, The Waltons?
Dorothy: Mr. Pfeiffer...
Mr. Pfeiffer: Oh, no, it's Puh-feiffer. The "P" is not silent.
Dorothy: ...anyway, Mr...Puh-feiffer...about the puh-funeral -- about the funeral...
Mr. Pfeiffer: Oh, no, it's Puh-feiffer. The "P" is not silent.
Dorothy: ...anyway, Mr...Puh-feiffer...about the puh-funeral -- about the funeral...
Dorothy: Oh Blanche, have you seen Jean this morning?
Blanche: She and Rose shared a room last night. Listen, Dorothy... You don't think Jean would ever...do you?
Dorothy: Look Blanche, I DO NOT believe that anything other than Gin Rummy happened between Jean and Rose last night.
[Rose enters]
Blanche: She and Rose shared a room last night. Listen, Dorothy... You don't think Jean would ever...do you?
Dorothy: Look Blanche, I DO NOT believe that anything other than Gin Rummy happened between Jean and Rose last night.
[Rose enters]
Dorothy: Oh, I don't know. Two policemen living in our house?
Blanche: So what's that to be afraid of, Dorothy? Once you strip away the gruff exterior, the badge, the gun, the uniform-
Dorothy: You've got a naked policeman.
Blanche: Exactly.
Blanche: So what's that to be afraid of, Dorothy? Once you strip away the gruff exterior, the badge, the gun, the uniform-
Dorothy: You've got a naked policeman.
Blanche: Exactly.
Dorothy: Oh, I remember when Stanley told me he was having an affair. It was at least 24 hours before I cut the crotches out of all his slacks.
Blanche: You didn't!
Dorothy: I was teaching English Lit at the time. Symbolism was my life.
Blanche: You didn't!
Dorothy: I was teaching English Lit at the time. Symbolism was my life.
Dorothy: Rose, what do you call a woman who sleeps with a man on the first date?
Blanche: [trying to defuse situation] A damn good sport?
Blanche: [trying to defuse situation] A damn good sport?
Dorothy: Uhh Rose, Are you going to be very much longer?
Rose: Not now, Dorothy. This man is still very down about his financial situation. He was one of the principal backers of Howard the Duck.
Rose: Not now, Dorothy. This man is still very down about his financial situation. He was one of the principal backers of Howard the Duck.
Dorothy: Uhh, Aunt Angela? Where did you get this chicken?
Angela: The garage.
Blanche: I guess this means no live entertainment with dessert.
Angela: The garage.
Blanche: I guess this means no live entertainment with dessert.
Dorothy: We are throwing a surprise birthday party for Blanche. I want you to go out to the lanai and mingle with the other guests.
Sophia: Check! ...What's a lanai?
Dorothy: The porch!
Sophia: Excuse me, Krystle Carrington!
Sophia: Check! ...What's a lanai?
Dorothy: The porch!
Sophia: Excuse me, Krystle Carrington!
Dorothy: We have created a poetry-writing citrus farmer who writes his letters with a lavender felt pen, and Rose thinks he's the most fascinating creature on earth. Now what does that tell you?
Blanche: About Rose?
Dorothy: About the whole bunch of us!
Blanche: About Rose?
Dorothy: About the whole bunch of us!
Dorothy: We're interested in arranging a funeral.
Mr. Pfeiffer: Isn't that lovely. The three of you planning ahead for Mother.
Sophia: Hey, Puh-feiffer, how would you like a punch in your puh-face?
Mr. Pfeiffer: Isn't that lovely. The three of you planning ahead for Mother.
Sophia: Hey, Puh-feiffer, how would you like a punch in your puh-face?