Mystery Science Theater 3000 quotes
1930 total quotesCrow: Y'know, Space Chief should try going into space sometime!
Servo: Yeah, he's more like Lower-Atmosphere Chief.
Mike: Barely-Off-The-Stupid-Ground Chief.
Servo: Yeah, he's more like Lower-Atmosphere Chief.
Mike: Barely-Off-The-Stupid-Ground Chief.
Crow: You know, this is almost as good as 2001... nails driven into your eyes!
Daphne: [singing to "Everybody Have Fun Tonight"] Everybody have sex tonight!
Servo: Everybody throw up tonight.
Crow: Ironically, no one in the band Wang Chung had sex that night.
Servo: Everybody throw up tonight.
Crow: Ironically, no one in the band Wang Chung had sex that night.
Deaney: How do you like your Scotch, Mitchell?
Crow [as Mitchell]: Uh, by the quart.
Crow [as Mitchell]: Uh, by the quart.
Deathstalker: ...Now here he is, drinking wine and chasing women.
Mike: Spo-dee o-dee.
Mike: Spo-dee o-dee.
Det. Sorrell: [on the issue of Bobby's murder] The kid was impaled with a baseball bat; I don't know how this James Earl guy could do it!
Capt. Churchman: Maybe James Earl has a great batting average.
Servo: But it's the R.B.Is that count, isn't it?
Capt. Churchman: Maybe James Earl has a great batting average.
Servo: But it's the R.B.Is that count, isn't it?
Dr. Erling: Think, Bob. Throughout human history, what has been the first activity of explorers of any new region?
Crow [as Hedges]: Genocide?
Mike [as Hedges]: Slavery?
Servo [as Hedges]: Diseased blanket spreading?
Crow [as Hedges]: Genocide?
Mike [as Hedges]: Slavery?
Servo [as Hedges]: Diseased blanket spreading?
Dr. Forrester: [Stopping his Brain Scan on TV's Frank and looking at the Camera] Ah, Joel. Your experiment this week is your first western. It's called "Gunslinger" and it stars Beverly Garland in her pre-Doddy period.
TV's Frank: Beverly Garland [growls, but is cut off by another scan]
Dr. Forrester: And it's directed by Roger Corman, so your brain might explode before Frank's does. [turns back to scan Frank before looking back quickly] Yippie-ki-yay, mama jama.
TV's Frank: Beverly Garland [growls, but is cut off by another scan]
Dr. Forrester: And it's directed by Roger Corman, so your brain might explode before Frank's does. [turns back to scan Frank before looking back quickly] Yippie-ki-yay, mama jama.
Dr. Forrester: Now, prepare yourself for... oh, but before I start the experiment... did you... y'know, go?
Mike, Crow, Servo: [dejected] Yes...
Dr. Forrester: Becuase I don't want to have to stop the movie for... y'know...
Mike, Crow, Servo: You won't...
Dr. Forrester: Then, prepare yourself for This Island Earth!
Mike, Crow, Servo: [dejected] Yes...
Dr. Forrester: Becuase I don't want to have to stop the movie for... y'know...
Mike, Crow, Servo: You won't...
Dr. Forrester: Then, prepare yourself for This Island Earth!
Dr. Forrester: Well Jimmy Smits, your movie today is roasted fresh from the kitchens of Bert I Gordon. It's a fetid little piece of tripe featuring sword and sorcery, Gary Lockwood and an embarrassed Basil Rathbone.
Dr. Forrester: Well, here it comes, Joel -- Mitchell! It's a�� super secret spy�� uh, has a motorcycle�� marooned in space�� meets�� Hercules�� or not�� uhhh�� watch it and weep, Joel-Prole-Mole!