Glee quotes
931 total quotesFinn: What the hell, dude? How about you talk with me about this first?
Kurt: I'm sorry Finn, but there's nothing to talk about. Karofsky's coming back tomorrow, so that means I won't be.
Sam: We can protect you.
Puck: Seriously. We can form a perimeter around you, like the Secret Service.
Finn: Yeah.
Kurt: The only thing that can really protect me is what they have at Dalton: a zero-tolerance no bullying policy.
Kurt: I'm sorry Finn, but there's nothing to talk about. Karofsky's coming back tomorrow, so that means I won't be.
Sam: We can protect you.
Puck: Seriously. We can form a perimeter around you, like the Secret Service.
Finn: Yeah.
Kurt: The only thing that can really protect me is what they have at Dalton: a zero-tolerance no bullying policy.
Finn: What up, Grilled Cheesus? I need to ask you for something. I didn't go to Sunday school so I don't know if God works the same as a genie and I only get three wishes, but here's the thing... Dating Rachel is great, but she's kind of a prude and I'm sort of going crazy. Anyway, her boobs aren't that great, but they're still girl boobs and I'll still like to touch them. So, Jesus, considering that I've dedicated a week of my musical life to you, I hope you can see it in your heart to answer my prayers. Amen.
Finn: What's that saying? The show's gotta go all over the place or something.
Rachel: You mean the show's got to go on.
Rachel: You mean the show's got to go on.
Finn: When I pulled the sandwich out, I saw the face of God. Literally: I have made a Grilled Cheesus. I'm not the most religious guy. I sort of worship Eric Clapton and Ochocinco.
Finn: Who told you this? Kurt?
Rachel: No!
Kurt: [walking by] Yes.
Rachel: [gasps]
Rachel: No!
Kurt: [walking by] Yes.
Rachel: [gasps]
Finn: Wow, Quinn, that was incredible!
Will: Even more incredible is her big news. Tell them.
Quinn: I got into Yale! [clapping and cheering]
Will: It's Just--It's amazing for everything you've been through, you really deserve this, Quinn.
Mercedes: We're so proud of you, Quinn.
Quinn: I wanted to thank you guys, because without each and every one of you this would've never happened. You supported me and loved me through all the drama. And that's why I'm standing here. I wasted so much time hating myself for the stupid mistakes that I made, but the truth is is that without all of those I never would've dreamed this to be my future. I was the only one standing in the way of myself. You can't change your past, but you can let go and start your future.[cheering]
Will: Even more incredible is her big news. Tell them.
Quinn: I got into Yale! [clapping and cheering]
Will: It's Just--It's amazing for everything you've been through, you really deserve this, Quinn.
Mercedes: We're so proud of you, Quinn.
Quinn: I wanted to thank you guys, because without each and every one of you this would've never happened. You supported me and loved me through all the drama. And that's why I'm standing here. I wasted so much time hating myself for the stupid mistakes that I made, but the truth is is that without all of those I never would've dreamed this to be my future. I was the only one standing in the way of myself. You can't change your past, but you can let go and start your future.[cheering]
Finn: You can't do this to him.
Kurt: You're overreacting.
Finn: If he sings with you, you're painting a bull's eye on his back.
Kurt: Once again your closeted homophobia seeps in the surface on the contents of a cracked cesspool.
Finn: Don't give me that. I know I shouldn't have used that word in your basement but it's not like you were innocent. I really like you Kurt. But the fact of the matter is, the way you were all over me last year - if I did that to a girl, she'd take out a restraining order.
Kurt: You have issues with me being gay, I get it.
Finn: No, actually, I don't. I have issues with the fact that you don't understand that no means no.
Kurt: I just want to sing with him.
Kurt: You're overreacting.
Finn: If he sings with you, you're painting a bull's eye on his back.
Kurt: Once again your closeted homophobia seeps in the surface on the contents of a cracked cesspool.
Finn: Don't give me that. I know I shouldn't have used that word in your basement but it's not like you were innocent. I really like you Kurt. But the fact of the matter is, the way you were all over me last year - if I did that to a girl, she'd take out a restraining order.
Kurt: You have issues with me being gay, I get it.
Finn: No, actually, I don't. I have issues with the fact that you don't understand that no means no.
Kurt: I just want to sing with him.
Finn: You're the best girlfriend ever. [leans in to kiss Rachel]
Rachel: No, you got grease on your nose.
Finn: Oh. [about to wipe his nose]
Rachel: [shrugs] What the heck. [kisses Finn]
Rachel: No, you got grease on your nose.
Finn: Oh. [about to wipe his nose]
Rachel: [shrugs] What the heck. [kisses Finn]
Finn: You've given me everything I prayed for and it turns out that Rachel's boobs are really awesome.
Girl: TOTS!
Kurt: Oh, my God.
[All the teenagers in the lunchroom are chanting "tots".]
Kurt: Oh, my God.
[All the teenagers in the lunchroom are chanting "tots".]
Hiram: Even Patti Lupone herself couldn't talk Rachel out of marrying Finn.
LeRoy: Barbara could.
Hiram: Maybe Barbara.
Burt: Who's Barbara?
Carole: Streisand.
LeRoy: Barbara could.
Hiram: Maybe Barbara.
Burt: Who's Barbara?
Carole: Streisand.
Hiram: Here's what we're gonna do. When the Justice of the Peace says "Does anybody here object?"
Burt: Hell yeah! I do!
Hiram: We will all say "we do". [in singsong] With feeling! Burt! You will run interference with Finn! Carole! You will distract the Justice of the Peace with your feminine wiles. [Carole throws her arms up in annoyance] I will hustle Rachel out the side door and into our waiting car where you, Leroy, will drive, I don't drive, straight to Broadway! And if that doesn't start to get our baby girl back on her career track, I don't know what will. Are we agreed?
Burt: Sounds like a plan.
Burt: Hell yeah! I do!
Hiram: We will all say "we do". [in singsong] With feeling! Burt! You will run interference with Finn! Carole! You will distract the Justice of the Peace with your feminine wiles. [Carole throws her arms up in annoyance] I will hustle Rachel out the side door and into our waiting car where you, Leroy, will drive, I don't drive, straight to Broadway! And if that doesn't start to get our baby girl back on her career track, I don't know what will. Are we agreed?
Burt: Sounds like a plan.