Veronica: Domonick?
Domonick: Yeah.
Veronica: Where'd you get the video of me
Domonick: I don't know what you're talking about.
Veronica: Your pubescent snickering tells me differently.
Domonick: Someone sent it to me.
Veronica: You should tell me who, or I can assume it originated from you.
Domonick: You can assume whatever position you like
Veronica: I'm thinking chokehold you gasping for your last breath.
Domonick: Shh sweetheart, sweetheart you are so much hotter with the sound off.
Veronica: You'll really be better off giving me that name.
Domonick: Yeah well I guess I need to quiver in fear now so see ya.
Veronica: Okay then.

Veronica: From 18,000 down to two. Your attention to detail has served us well, young Jedis.

Veronica: Funny. No one's come running up to me.
Meg: It's because people are afraid of you.
Veronica: Then something's working.
Meg: Getting tough? Yeah, that was good advice. And I needed that. The getting even part? You might want to rethink that one. You do have friends, Veronica.

Veronica: Got any enemies you know about?
Wallace: Well, there's the Klan.
Veronica: This isn't really their M.O.
Wallace: Well, then I guess that leaves everybody that hates you

Veronica: He [Casey Gant] joined a cult? What do they worship? Wedgies? Keggers? Their parents' platinum cards?

Veronica: Hello? Yes, this is 'Miss Sabrina'. A bad boy? Well...Nestor Greely of Encinitas, twenty grand on credit cards, two divorces, and a repo'd Sebring. You have been a bad boy! Miss Sabrina commands you: put your pants back on and get a job!

Veronica: Here's a thought: If Tijuana was Logan's idea, then stealing the car could have been the master plan.
Troy: It was more of a meeting of the minds, if you will.
Veronica: Ah, so what was on the menu for this night of grand debauchery?
Troy: Let's see, uh, from eight to nine, we brainstormed on how to overthrow Kim Jong Il. From nine to ten, we deleted the records of the black voters of Florida. After that, it was, uh, yeah, it was all donkey shows.
Veronica: Ah, so the usual?
Troy: Pretty much.

Veronica: Hey Dad!
Keith: Yeah honey.
Veronica: If I know the name of a business how do I find out the names of its' shareholders?
Keith: You get the strangest homework in health class.

Veronica: Hey, Nish. I've got a present for you.
Nish: You're transferring?
Veronica: A list. The names of every member of the Castle. All men. You think this will help with that lawsuit?
Nish: Oh, my God. Politicians. Tycoons. Celebrities. This is gold. You're gonna make some very powerful men very unhappy.
Veronica: Won't be the first time.

Veronica: Hey, you never told me what happened with your whole man crush thing.
Mac: Wallace has a man crush?
Piz: The man crush isn't me, is it?
Veronica: Some guy following him around campus. Is it Piz?

Veronica: Hi, Dad. Their case is fuzzy and circumstantial.
Keith: You know the odd thing? Those were also her first words.

Veronica: How hard can it be to find an actor named Tom Cruz?
Wallace: Tom Cruise? Not as good a private eye as I thought.

Veronica: Howdy, boys. Anyone up for going to a Pi Sig blowout? [Wallace and Piz look unimpressed] Beer and ladies and music...and other stuff guys like, I'm sure? Fast cars, loose slots, electronic gadgetry? Televised sports? Pornography? Nothing? None of this grabs you?
Piz: We were already planning on going.
Wallace: I think everybody at Hearst is gonna be there.
Veronica: Awesome. Then you can help me out.
Wallace: Suddenly, it sounds like a lot less fun.

Veronica: I bet you'd be pretty psyched if I found someone who could help.
Keith: My level of psyched would depend on the someone.
Veronica: Eli Navarro. Remember?
Keith: You mean Weevil? Oh, Veronica, please.
Veronica: Dad, I'm serious.
Keith: Oh, I don't know, all those times I arrested him, he never struck me as great secretary material. Didn't he get busted for murder?
Veronica: Assault.
Keith: See, so he's not even a very good murderer.

Veronica: I gotta run. The counselor wants to see me before class.
Keith: About what?
Veronica: Uh, my schedule and my attitude, not necessarily in that order. Her words.