Josh: Sir, have you read the talking points?
Bartlet: I'm an economist. Some would say half-decent. I don't need a primer on this.
Charlie: Due respect,sir, your answers on economics can be a bit---
Bartlet: Polysyllabic?
CJ: Academic.
Leo: I was going to go with incomprehensible.

Josh: So last night was nice. Nice. It was really nice. On the nice scale it was way up there in terms of... you know, niceness.
Donna: Be still and listen to me. I don't know what this is. And you don't, either, which is perfectly fine and understandable. Whatever the buildup, it's all happened amid absurdly heightened emotional circumstances: the election, Leo's death. There's been... not a moment to so much as... take a breath, much less figure any of this out. And now this roller coaster's plunging into the transition, with its time-pressure demands and then the inauguration, and it's hit the ground running, and the first hundred days and, before you know it, the midterms and the new Congress, and then we're running again and four years becomes eight, and... we've never had the talk. And you can lose that look of panic in your eyes. We're not going to have it now; we don't ever have to have it. But there's a window. I'd say four weeks. If we can't get it together in that time to figure out what we want from each other, then clearly it's not worth the trouble. While last night was lovely, I've already called a cab. You should put on some coffee, and I'll see you at the office.

Josh: So, now you have two choices - meeting with an unruly mob or meeting with lunatic mapmakers.
Toby: Or getting paid a lot more money working almost anywhere else I want.

Josh: Stopping all bipartisan legislation is like saying 'Let's blow up the place. Maybe voters'll hire us to rebuild it.'

Josh: Take it easy.
Sam: I won't take it easy! Give me the phone. I'm gonna call the Senator and I'm gonna tell him that he can shove his legislative agenda up his ass!
Josh: I've already done that.
Sam: I'll do it again.
Josh: You know what this is like? This is like The Godfather. When Pacino tells James Caan that he's gonna kill the cop. It's a lot like that scene, only not really.
...
Josh: It is like that scene. I'm James Caan. [to Sam] You're...you're Al Pacino.
Toby: Let's go.
Josh: Toby, you're the guy who shows Pacino how to make tomato sauce.

Josh: Taylor Reid was talking about your spin on the decline in manufacturing jobs and he said...
Toby: 'The tall lady's back to telling tall tales.'
CJ: The tall lady.... Carol, call 'The Taylor Reid Show' and book me on the next open slot. I'm going to reach down and rip off his puny, little face.

Josh: Tell me democracy doesn't have a sense of humor. We sit here, we drink this beer out here on the stoop, in violation of about 47 city ordinances. I don't know, Toby, it's election night. What do you say about a government that goes out of its way to protect even citizens that try to destroy it?
Toby: God bless America.

Josh: Ten words: "I will make America's defenses the strongest in the history of the world."
Leo: "In the history of the world?" When we say that, are we comparing ourselves to the Visigoths, adjusted for inflation?

Josh: The ad's a sham. Anyone can see from the full interview.
Lou: Then bam, we hit Vinick with a political two-by-four.
Josh: You don't have to be happy about this.
Lou: You don't have to be queasy about this.
Josh: You don't know Santos the way I do. If this becomes a full-out negative...
Lou: You think he's got a glass jaw?
Josh: I think we lose a negative ad war. I think the other side is better at this and I think they have more to work with.

Josh: The number of people whose permission I need before I can do whatever the hell I want... Let me tell you something - there's really a lot to be said for fascism.

Josh: There's a Citizen's Stamp Advisory Committee?
Leo: Yes.
Josh: Made up of members of the There-But-For-The-Grace-of-God-go-I Club?
Leo: You wanna mock people or let me talk to Toby?
Josh: I wanna mock people.

Josh: This guy is the real deal.
Sam: You said that last time.
Josh: Yeah, and look how right I was.

Josh: This, right here, this is the reason why you have a reputation as a pain in the ass.
Toby: I've cultivated that reputation.

Josh: Toby, come quick, Sam's getting his ass kicked by a girl.
Toby: Ginger, get the popcorn.

Josh: Vast and violent vacuum cleaner, uprooting everything in its path.
Toby: It's a funnel cloud.
Josh: Vast and violent vacuum cleaner.
CJ: It's a vacuum cleaner and a funnel cloud. See, men? Peace on earth.