CSI: Crime Scene Investigation quotes
0 total quotesGrissom: Damon opened the door. He lied.
Warrick: So what happens now?
Grissom: We chase the lie, 'til it leads to the truth.
Warrick: So what happens now?
Grissom: We chase the lie, 'til it leads to the truth.
Grissom: Deerstalker cap, violin, Meerschaum pipe, even a Persian slipper with tobacco stuffed in the toe, I imagine. All in all, meticulous recreation of 221-B Baker Street: residence of the world's greatest detective, Sherlock Holmes.
Brass: Also known as Dennis Kingsley, delivery guy. What do you think?
Grissom: Ask Greg. It's his case. It's his final proficiency test. Emphasis in the "final".
Brass: Okay, Dr. Watson, run it.
Brass: Also known as Dennis Kingsley, delivery guy. What do you think?
Grissom: Ask Greg. It's his case. It's his final proficiency test. Emphasis in the "final".
Brass: Okay, Dr. Watson, run it.
Grissom: Did you hear the one about the cop and the monkey who walk into a bar?
Catherine: I'm not in the mood.
Grissom: Neither was the monkey.
Catherine: I'm not in the mood.
Grissom: Neither was the monkey.
Grissom: Did you injure yourself, Mrs. Perez? (Mrs. Perez looks down at a bloodstain on her shirt)
Mrs. Perez: Oh, a nosebleed.
Grissom: That's a lot of blood. I'm going to need to take your shirt.
Mr. Perez: Why?
Grissom: If you like, I can have someone follow you home so that you can change.
Mrs. Perez: You think we had something to do with it? Our daughter is missing. She's out there somewhere alone and scared. What are you doing about that?
Grissom: I'm just collecting evidence.
Mrs. Perez: Fine. Here! (she removes her shirt and throws it at Grissom) Take it! Go find her!
Mrs. Perez: Oh, a nosebleed.
Grissom: That's a lot of blood. I'm going to need to take your shirt.
Mr. Perez: Why?
Grissom: If you like, I can have someone follow you home so that you can change.
Mrs. Perez: You think we had something to do with it? Our daughter is missing. She's out there somewhere alone and scared. What are you doing about that?
Grissom: I'm just collecting evidence.
Mrs. Perez: Fine. Here! (she removes her shirt and throws it at Grissom) Take it! Go find her!
Grissom: Did you see any transexuals when you danced?
Catherine: Gil, only civilians confuse strippers and showgirls. You can't cheat the full monty.
Catherine: Gil, only civilians confuse strippers and showgirls. You can't cheat the full monty.
Grissom: Did you try this coffee?
Nick: Mm-mm.
Grissom: The last cup I had tasted like motor oil.
[Greg runs in]
Greg: Oh, don't touch it. That's my pot!
Grissom: Your pot?
Greg: Yeah, you know, from my own private stash. Blue Hawaiian -- $40 a pound. Only grown a couple times a year on the Big Island hand-picked to perfection.
Grissom: Good. You're using my water so I guess that makes it community coffee.
Nick: Mm-mm.
Grissom: The last cup I had tasted like motor oil.
[Greg runs in]
Greg: Oh, don't touch it. That's my pot!
Grissom: Your pot?
Greg: Yeah, you know, from my own private stash. Blue Hawaiian -- $40 a pound. Only grown a couple times a year on the Big Island hand-picked to perfection.
Grissom: Good. You're using my water so I guess that makes it community coffee.
Grissom: Dressed as a woman among men dressed as women. Now, see? That's a disguise.
Grissom: Ecklie! I want everything right now.
Ecklie: I've been going over it.
Grissom: The Collins case is my shift. You are completely off base.
Ecklie: What, you're afraid I'll find something that might show you up?
Grissom: Oh, I'm sure, if you could, you would have by now. Where is it?
Ecklie: I don't care that you got some pimply-faced kid to confess. You kept the Sheriff out of the loop. That's a career killer, Gil.
Grissom: That's what so sad, Conrad. You think of this as a career.
Ecklie: I've been going over it.
Grissom: The Collins case is my shift. You are completely off base.
Ecklie: What, you're afraid I'll find something that might show you up?
Grissom: Oh, I'm sure, if you could, you would have by now. Where is it?
Ecklie: I don't care that you got some pimply-faced kid to confess. You kept the Sheriff out of the loop. That's a career killer, Gil.
Grissom: That's what so sad, Conrad. You think of this as a career.
Grissom: Friedrich Miescher requests my presence?
Greg: Figured out my code huh? Well you know my boy, Freddie, discovered DNA.
Grissom: He's been dead a hundred years, Greg.
Greg: Figured out my code huh? Well you know my boy, Freddie, discovered DNA.
Grissom: He's been dead a hundred years, Greg.
Grissom: Greg!
Greg: Yeah.
Grissom: Take off your shoes and socks.
Greg: See, now we're getting into this whole strip forensics thing and I'm not too sure I can hang with that - even if you are my boss.
Grissom: Your mother's maiden name was Hojem? Hojem is Norwegian, right?
Greg: That's right and you know my grandfather was tossed from Norway for getting my grandmother pregnant before they got married. To this day he still tells me, "Som man reder sa ligger man". [long pause] One must lie in the bed one has made.
Grissom: That's true. Right foot first, please.
Greg: Are you sure you want me to do this? Things could get loud in here!
Greg: Yeah.
Grissom: Take off your shoes and socks.
Greg: See, now we're getting into this whole strip forensics thing and I'm not too sure I can hang with that - even if you are my boss.
Grissom: Your mother's maiden name was Hojem? Hojem is Norwegian, right?
Greg: That's right and you know my grandfather was tossed from Norway for getting my grandmother pregnant before they got married. To this day he still tells me, "Som man reder sa ligger man". [long pause] One must lie in the bed one has made.
Grissom: That's true. Right foot first, please.
Greg: Are you sure you want me to do this? Things could get loud in here!
Grissom: Greg, how many licks are take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?
Greg: The world may never know.
Warrick: Just see if you get some DNA off this stick, would you?
Greg: All work and no play makes Greg a dull boy.
Grissom: All play and no work makes Greg an unemployed boy.
Greg: The world may never know.
Warrick: Just see if you get some DNA off this stick, would you?
Greg: All work and no play makes Greg a dull boy.
Grissom: All play and no work makes Greg an unemployed boy.
Grissom: Have you got the DNA results from the fingernail Catherine found?
Greg: Yeah. They're not a match to Patrick Haynes.
Grissom: I never figured a man for the fingernail, Greg.
Greg: But this is where you break out the can of creep repellent. Half of the DNA markers are in common.
Grissom: A possible first degree relative?
Greg: Yeah. They're not a match to Patrick Haynes.
Grissom: I never figured a man for the fingernail, Greg.
Greg: But this is where you break out the can of creep repellent. Half of the DNA markers are in common.
Grissom: A possible first degree relative?
Grissom: Have you let anyone else touch this note? Police, a relative, anyone?
Dad: No, just us. Why?
Grissom: Well, because the person who touched it before you has your son, and he's just left us the first piece of the puzzle.
Dad: No, just us. Why?
Grissom: Well, because the person who touched it before you has your son, and he's just left us the first piece of the puzzle.