Arrested Development quotes
177 total quotesGob: The zero hour, Michael. It's the end of the line. I'm the firstborn. Sick of playing second fiddle. Always third in line for everything. Tired of finishing fourth. Being the fifth wheel. [thinks for a moment] There are six things I'm mad about, and I'm taking over.
Jessie: There are very few intelligent, attractive and straight men in this town.
Tobias: Well, that certainly leaves me out. [Everyone looks at Tobias] You said "single," right? She said "single."
Tobias: Well, that certainly leaves me out. [Everyone looks at Tobias] You said "single," right? She said "single."
Jessie: We need to make Michael the new face of the Bluth company. He's the only likable one in the bunch. No offense.
Michael: None taken.
Michael: None taken.
Jessie: Your father's religious now? We'll play that up. It's very sympathetic.
Lucille: Yeah. Who doesn't love the Jews?
Lucille: Yeah. Who doesn't love the Jews?
Kitty: Do you like my outfit?
Gob: Not as much as I like what's underneath it.
Kitty: Gob!
Gob: No, I need your chair. Get up.
Gob: Not as much as I like what's underneath it.
Kitty: Gob!
Gob: No, I need your chair. Get up.
Kitty: Gob? I wish I would have know you were coming. I am a mess.
Gob: I don't know if a call from me would've changed that.
Gob: I don't know if a call from me would've changed that.
Lindsay: (loudly) Well, how embarrassing. My own brother buying me? I'd rather die. (whispers to Michael) Thank you. Maybe you're not that selfish.
Lindsay: I care deeply for nature.
Michael: You're wearing ostrich-skin boots.
Lindsay: Well, I don't care about ostriches.
Michael: You're wearing ostrich-skin boots.
Lindsay: Well, I don't care about ostriches.
Lindsay: It would just give Dad one more reason to think that I've got nothing to offer but my looks.
GOB: Yeah, I got some of that. Except he also didn't like my looks.
GOB: Yeah, I got some of that. Except he also didn't like my looks.
Lindsay: It's George Michael, he told me. I think he wants a mother.
Michael: Well that's ridiculous. He's got you, he's got our mother. You'd think that would turn him off to the entire concept.
Michael: Well that's ridiculous. He's got you, he's got our mother. You'd think that would turn him off to the entire concept.
Lindsay: Look, I screwed up, ok? I'm lost, and I hate them. I hate the Wetlands. They're stupid and wet, and there are bugs everywhere, and I think I maced a crane, Michael.
Lindsay: Well, they expect a certain amount of theft, Michael. It's built into the price. If I didn't take it, then people would be overpaying for nothing.
Lindsay: Well, you and I have different management styles. I believe work should be fun, and you try to crush people's spirits. What's next, Michael? Are you going to make dancing illegal? Is this the tiny town from Footloose?
Lindsay: Where's Nana?
Lucille: I sent her on a wonderful cruise. You just missed a wonderful call from her. She just came back from a wonderful costume party that the captain threw. She gained ten pounds, there's so much food on that boat. She's up to 74. She tried pesto for the first time. Imagine that, 92 years old and she never tried pesto. It was wonderful. Just wonderful.
Narrator: In fact, Lucille's mother had been dead for six months.
Lucille: I sent her on a wonderful cruise. You just missed a wonderful call from her. She just came back from a wonderful costume party that the captain threw. She gained ten pounds, there's so much food on that boat. She's up to 74. She tried pesto for the first time. Imagine that, 92 years old and she never tried pesto. It was wonderful. Just wonderful.
Narrator: In fact, Lucille's mother had been dead for six months.
Lucille 2: Buster, this is exactly why our relationship does not work.
Buster: Our relationship doesn't work?
Lucille 2: No, not as long as you keep getting me all mixed up with your mother.
Buster: It is exactly the opposite. I'm leaving my mother for you. You're replacing my mother.
Lucille 2: Well, that's healthy.
Buster: Our relationship doesn't work?
Lucille 2: No, not as long as you keep getting me all mixed up with your mother.
Buster: It is exactly the opposite. I'm leaving my mother for you. You're replacing my mother.
Lucille 2: Well, that's healthy.