American Dad! quotes
527 total quotesPope (on a hamburger phone as he's watching the news footage of Stan beating up Roger): Are you seeing this shit?
Principal Lewis: [on answering machine] Hey, it's Lewis. I can never find the damn phone. [Principal Lewis starts frantically searching for the phone]
Marguerite: [on the phone] Lewis, it's the hot tub. I did some research, man. It used to have a stripper pole in it. They banned it because some tubs, when they get struck by lightning, they come alive! The hot tub is alive, and it escaped from a mental institution, and did some rapes...
Principal Lewis: [who has been searching for the phone and found it in the freezer in the ice cream] What are you saying, Marguerite?
Marguerite: [over phone still] I'm saying, the hot tub, is a murderer.
Marguerite: [on the phone] Lewis, it's the hot tub. I did some research, man. It used to have a stripper pole in it. They banned it because some tubs, when they get struck by lightning, they come alive! The hot tub is alive, and it escaped from a mental institution, and did some rapes...
Principal Lewis: [who has been searching for the phone and found it in the freezer in the ice cream] What are you saying, Marguerite?
Marguerite: [over phone still] I'm saying, the hot tub, is a murderer.
Principal Lewis: Kid's got shaky hands. His parents got a divorce because his mom got caught banging some black guy named THIS BIG MAMMA JAMMA RIGHT HERE!!
Roger: (picking up a wig) : Thank God this one survived. I can still go to cowboy weddings.
Roger: [high-pitched voice after breathing in a helium balloon] When I was a little girl, Grover Cleveland was president.
Season 8
Season 8
Roger: Ah, you dumb son of a bitch! No, that's not Roland Chang. You're doing great!
Stan Smith: [sighs] What a day.
Cleveland Brown: [off-screen] Tell me about it.
[Stan turns to see Cleveland and we pull back to reveal the Brown house next to the Smith house as Cleveland walks up to Stan]
Cleveland Brown: [off-screen] Tell me about it.
[Stan turns to see Cleveland and we pull back to reveal the Brown house next to the Smith house as Cleveland walks up to Stan]
Stan (as he's beating up Roger, who was chosen to play Jesus in the Christmas play): You don't deserve to be on that cross, you lazy, wine-loving bisexual!
Stan: Stop! You can't marry this woman!
Principal Lewis: Wachoo talkin' bout, Stan?
Principal Lewis: Wachoo talkin' bout, Stan?