Ryan: What's with all the questions?
Seth: Nothing, I'm just trying to exhaust your issues so we can get to mine.

Ryan: You didn't try to help. You didn't even stop.
Volchok: I got scared. I freaked a hell.
Ryan: And she died. On the side of the road.
Volchok: I think about that night every day. It's all I think about. I wish I could take it back.
Ryan: I don't wanna hear about how bad you feel. Tell me why you did it.
Volchok: Does it matter?
Ryan: It matters to me.
Volchok: I don't know, okay? I mean, I was coming after you. You got the girl I didn't. It was hard for me handle. I just... I wanted you to pull over. And all just... it got out of control.
Ryan: So what? It was all an accident? A mistake?
Volchok: I know that doesn't change anything. So if you wanna finish this... I'm not gonna fight back.
Ryan: I'm not doing any favors. You have to live with what you did. It's over.

Ryan: You guys have tennis courts and a swimming pool?
Seth: I'm guessing you didn't at your old school.
Ryan: Well, we had a basketball hoop.

Ryan: You know what I like about rich kids? [punches Luke] Nothing.

Ryan: You'd better pray for a Chrimukkah miracle.
Seth: I've got Jesus and Moses on my side, man.

Sandy: [to Kirsten] I'm an expert of fighting with your father. And believe me, every time you think you've driven him away, he comes roaring back asking for more - you couldn't beat him off with a stick.

Sandy: And you're going to yogalates.
Kirsten: You just like saying that.
Sandy: Yogalates? Yeah, I kinda do. Yogalates?
Ryan: Yogalates.

Sandy: Are you going somewhere?
Caleb: Like, say, San Quentin?

Sandy: Ask me while you're giving me the massage. I'm much more inclined to say yes.

Sandy: Caleb Nichol was not a man of many words. He was, however a brilliant man. He leaves a legacy of possibility. But his true achievements were his children. He was a caring father, a wonderful grandfather... a truly terrible father-in-law. So he may be gone, but he won't soon be forgotten. So rest in peace, Cal. And, if you can't do that... I'm sure heaven could use a few more McMansions.

Sandy: Do you think I look at all like Tony Blair?
Kirsten: Uh, you have nicer hair.
Sandy: Thank you. Good hair. Leader of Great Britain. I would call it a wash.

Sandy: Do you want to know what I think?
Ryan: You're going to tell me either way, right?
Sandy: Like my own son.

Sandy: Excuse me, forgive me, but I'm a very proud father, and I, I want to say a few words. I think I can speak for Kirsten and the other parents here tonight, when I tell you kids how thrilled we are to share this wonderful touchstone with you (applause). I know the last few years have been a little rough for us (everyone groans and laughs). There's been tragedy, and comedy, and first loves, and broken hearts. Family members were lost, and found. It hasn't all been perfect, but we're all family here. So cheers.

Sandy: Have dinner with us instead. I won't cook, I promise. Although if Kirsten's mad enough at you, she might.

Sandy: Hello, ladies!... Seth...
Seth: Dad, don't call me a lady.