The Closer quotes

288 total quotes



All Seasons
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Bloom: On Sunday at the time in question, Deanna was finishing up her 30-day detox at local rehab. She just got out yesterday morning.
[Deanna vomits into the toilet]
Brenda: I hope you kept the receipt.

Barbara, Estelle Pope's Attorney: We're here to talk about family and the threat posed to family when the father isn't up to the job. Ms. Johnson, since you have arrived in Los Angeles, you and Will Pope have worked very closely together. Long days, sometimes long nights, weekends, how much time does Mr. Pope actually have to spend with his children when it's really you he's spending time with?
Blanchard: Objection.
Barbara: On what grounds?
Blanchard: Your question is argumentative, harassing, and ends with a preposition. Kindly rephrase.
Barbara: This is ridiculous, Tom --
Brenda: Chief Pope and I are not having an affair!
Blanchard: Excuse me, Ms. Johnson. Will you kindly refrain from speaking? Now, Barbara, if you're going to pursue this line of questioning I would remind you that Chief Pope didn't leave his first wife for Ms. Johnson. He left her for Estelle. And unlike the future ex-Mrs. Pope, whose infidelity brings us here in the first place, Ms. Johnson has never broken a vow of marriage. So any attempt by your client to besmirch Deputy Chief Johnson's reputation will be considered harassment and grounds for a very long, expensive, and embarrassing lawsuit. During which I will drag your client into court and we can examine Estelle Pope's adulterous behavior with vigorous attention to detail. [turns to the stenographer] Are you getting all this?

Bloom: On Sunday at the time in question, Deanna was finishing up her 30-day detox at local rehab. She just got out yesterday morning.
[Deanna vomits into the toilet]
Brenda: I hope you kept the receipt.

Brenda: [After catching Provenza mocking her accent and task delegation] Lt. Provenza, I need this hurried through [using extra-heavy accent] SID, in about two shakes of a lamb's tail. [shaking wet toupee at him] Thank you so very much. Let's keep it taped off, ladies and gentlemen, because until we understand things better...[turns and looks at Provenza]
Provenza: Uh, [adding heavy southern accent] this is a crime scene, y'all.

Barbara, Estelle Pope's Attorney: We're here to talk about family and the threat posed to family when the father isn't up to the job. Ms. Johnson, since you have arrived in Los Angeles, you and Will Pope have worked very closely together. Long days, sometimes long nights, weekends, how much time does Mr. Pope actually have to spend with his children when it's really you he's spending time with?
Blanchard: Objection.
Barbara: On what grounds?
Blanchard: Your question is argumentative, harassing, and ends with a preposition. Kindly rephrase.
Barbara: This is ridiculous, Tom --
Brenda: Chief Pope and I are not having an affair!
Blanchard: Excuse me, Ms. Johnson. Will you kindly refrain from speaking? Now, Barbara, if you're going to pursue this line of questioning I would remind you that Chief Pope didn't leave his first wife for Ms. Johnson. He left her for Estelle. And unlike the future ex-Mrs. Pope, whose infidelity brings us here in the first place, Ms. Johnson has never broken a vow of marriage. So any attempt by your client to besmirch Deputy Chief Johnson's reputation will be considered harassment and grounds for a very long, expensive, and embarrassing lawsuit. During which I will drag your client into court and we can examine Estelle Pope's adulterous behavior with vigorous attention to detail. [turns to the stenographer] Are you getting all this?

Brenda: [After catching Provenza mocking her accent and task delegation] Lt. Provenza, I need this hurried through [using extra-heavy accent] SID, in about two shakes of a lamb's tail. [shaking wet toupee at him] Thank you so very much. Let's keep it taped off, ladies and gentlemen, because until we understand things better...[turns and looks at Provenza]
Provenza: Uh, [adding heavy southern accent] this is a crime scene, y'all.

Bloom: [after confessing to the murder] I'm really sorry that I never got the opportunity to knock off those horrible children. [pause] Is there a chance I could plead insanity?

Brenda: [complaining to Pope] I was promised a crew of elite detectives, and what Capt. Taylor here has given me is a bunch of junior varsity wannabees ...and Provenza.

Brenda: [after throwing up] ... dirty diapers in that trash over there...
Gabriel: yeah, because there's nothing else around here to make a person sick. [looking at the decapitated head and feet]
Brenda: I don't want to here another word about you and Daniels, ok? Just ... keep it to yourself. [Referring to the news of Gabriel and Daniels dating]

Agent Jackson: We're not going to get in anybody's way, trust me.
Brenda: I stopped believing boys who said "trust me" when I was sixteen.

Agent Jackson: We're not going to get in anybody's way, trust me.
Brenda: I stopped believing boys who said "trust me" when I was sixteen.

Bloom: [after confessing to the murder] I'm really sorry that I never got the opportunity to knock off those horrible children. [pause] Is there a chance I could plead insanity?

Brenda: ...I like to have answers before I ask questions.

Brenda: ...I like to have answers before I ask questions.

Brenda: [after throwing up] ... dirty diapers in that trash over there...
Gabriel: yeah, because there's nothing else around here to make a person sick. [looking at the decapitated head and feet]
Brenda: I don't want to here another word about you and Daniels, ok? Just ... keep it to yourself. [Referring to the news of Gabriel and Daniels dating]