Pushing Daisies quotes
74 total quotesNed: You can't touch me.
Chuck: So a kiss is out of the question?
Ned: I just lost my train of thought.
Chuck: So a kiss is out of the question?
Ned: I just lost my train of thought.
Chuck: You can't just touch someone's life and just be done with it.
Ned: Yes I can. That's how I roll.
Ned: Yes I can. That's how I roll.
Emerson: You know what? We all have childhood issues. Okay? Believe me. I got the full subscription, okay? Horror stories.
Ned: I kind of killed her dad when I was ten.
Emerson: Maybe not horror stories.
Ned: She doesn't know. But I wanted to make it better or different than what it was, because what it was was her dead and I didn't want that to be my fault too.
Emerson: Well, who died instead?
Ned: [shows Emerson an obituary for the funeral director] It's a random proximity thing.
Emerson: Bitch! I was in proximity.
Ned: I kind of killed her dad when I was ten.
Emerson: Maybe not horror stories.
Ned: She doesn't know. But I wanted to make it better or different than what it was, because what it was was her dead and I didn't want that to be my fault too.
Emerson: Well, who died instead?
Ned: [shows Emerson an obituary for the funeral director] It's a random proximity thing.
Emerson: Bitch! I was in proximity.
Emerson: The fact that he was a very, very bad man makes you feel better about what you did?
Ned: Yes. Immensely. I would have felt horrible if it was... you, for example.
Emerson: [smacks Ned on the head with rolled up newspaper.]
Ned: I'm not proud!
Emerson: You know, I'm glad you did it. Makes the worst thing I did seem insignificant.
Ned: Listen to you, all judgey-judge.
Ned: Yes. Immensely. I would have felt horrible if it was... you, for example.
Emerson: [smacks Ned on the head with rolled up newspaper.]
Ned: I'm not proud!
Emerson: You know, I'm glad you did it. Makes the worst thing I did seem insignificant.
Ned: Listen to you, all judgey-judge.
Deedee: Hey, Charlotte!
Chuck: Hey, Deedee.
Deedee: Now, how'd I know you'd be the first person I'd see when I got to...? Is this...? Which one is this?
Chuck: This is neither. Well, maybe it's both, but, listen, this is the deal: you get to talk for, like, a minute, we're gonna catch up, and then you're not talking anymore.
Deedee: Does everyone get to do this? 'Cause, girl, we gotta break it down.
Chuck: Did you know I was gonna get killed?
Deedee: I thought there might be the possibility, yes. I'm real sorry about that. I probably should've said something. But to be honest, and really, why not, at this point, if it were safe, I would've done it myself. God, this is fantastic! Being honest is fun!
Chuck: Hey, Deedee.
Deedee: Now, how'd I know you'd be the first person I'd see when I got to...? Is this...? Which one is this?
Chuck: This is neither. Well, maybe it's both, but, listen, this is the deal: you get to talk for, like, a minute, we're gonna catch up, and then you're not talking anymore.
Deedee: Does everyone get to do this? 'Cause, girl, we gotta break it down.
Chuck: Did you know I was gonna get killed?
Deedee: I thought there might be the possibility, yes. I'm real sorry about that. I probably should've said something. But to be honest, and really, why not, at this point, if it were safe, I would've done it myself. God, this is fantastic! Being honest is fun!
Narrator: One mile to the west, Emerson Cod was also not thrilled. During times of stress or anxiety, he liked to knit. Since the arrival of the dead girl who was not dead, he found the stockinette stitch relaxing.
Chuck: [regarding Emerson] Is he upset you brought your childhood sweetheart back to life?
Ned: He barely knows you're here.
Narrator: In fact, Emerson had finished knitting a sweater vest and two handgun cozies in the week since Chuck's return.
Ned: He barely knows you're here.
Narrator: In fact, Emerson had finished knitting a sweater vest and two handgun cozies in the week since Chuck's return.
Emerson: If I'd wanted to hang out with geeks in leotards, I would've stayed in art school.
Narrator: As Olive considered how much she loved Digby for paying attention to her when the pie-maker would not, Digby considered how much he loved salt.
Emerson: Lookit here... You need a ticket to ride this ride, and if your ticket gets punched then you gotta take somebody else's ticket.
Ned: Why are you still talking?!
Emerson: I'm ripping off the band-aid!
Ned: I'm not a ripper. I pull up a corner a little at a time and then I run it under warm water and I pull it a little bit more. It's a process!
Emerson: Let 'er rip.
Ned: Why are you still talking?!
Emerson: I'm ripping off the band-aid!
Ned: I'm not a ripper. I pull up a corner a little at a time and then I run it under warm water and I pull it a little bit more. It's a process!
Emerson: Let 'er rip.
Aunt Vivian: Pies for breakfast always remind me of Mother.
Aunt Lily: Vermouth always reminds me of Mother.
Aunt Lily: Vermouth always reminds me of Mother.
[Ned has brought back funeral director Lawrence to apologize]
Chuck: [noticing a pocket watch on Lawrence's body] Hey, I had one just like that.
Lawrence: Yeah, your dead body was buried with it.
Chuck You stole that off my dead body?
Lawrence: Well, your dead body wasn't doing anything with it.
[Chuck closes the casket; Ned tries to open it but can't]
Emerson: Oh, you better be playing.
Ned: [checks his watch] 12 seconds.
Emerson: Oh, hell no! [runs out of the funeral home making the Sign of the Cross]
Chuck: [noticing a pocket watch on Lawrence's body] Hey, I had one just like that.
Lawrence: Yeah, your dead body was buried with it.
Chuck You stole that off my dead body?
Lawrence: Well, your dead body wasn't doing anything with it.
[Chuck closes the casket; Ned tries to open it but can't]
Emerson: Oh, you better be playing.
Ned: [checks his watch] 12 seconds.
Emerson: Oh, hell no! [runs out of the funeral home making the Sign of the Cross]