My Name Is Earl quotes
77 total quotesEarl: It was like some crazy cross between Rocky and Supermarket Sweep.
Season 4
Season 4
Earl: It's gone!
Dodge: What's gone?
Earl: Mystery Fun Land. They tore it down. Now I can't cross ya off the list.
Dodge: You mean your "idiot list"?
Earl: Is that what your mom calls it?
Dodge: She also puts another word in front of it, but I don't know what it means. The guy from Scarface says it a lot.
Earl Jr.: I know what it means.
Dodge: What's gone?
Earl: Mystery Fun Land. They tore it down. Now I can't cross ya off the list.
Dodge: You mean your "idiot list"?
Earl: Is that what your mom calls it?
Dodge: She also puts another word in front of it, but I don't know what it means. The guy from Scarface says it a lot.
Earl Jr.: I know what it means.
Earl: Now, before I forget, is there anything else I need to fix?
Tess: Uhh... I used my hand on a guy a little.
Earl: [a little high-pitched] Yeah, I don't know how to un-ring that bell!
Tess: Uhh... I used my hand on a guy a little.
Earl: [a little high-pitched] Yeah, I don't know how to un-ring that bell!
Earl: Remember, real men keep their emotions bottled up until they explode, and then they punch something that has nothing to do with what they're mad at.
Earl: We should have taken back roads, but how often do you get to surf a giant hot dog down main street?
Earl: What do the doctors say?
Little Chubby: I haven't been to a doctor. As my father used to say, "never trust a man who wants to stick his finger in your butt".
Earl: You can't argue with that logic.
Little Chubby: Yeah, well, if he was so smart he wouldn't have ended up with a hole in his head where the vodka should've been.
Season 3
Little Chubby: I haven't been to a doctor. As my father used to say, "never trust a man who wants to stick his finger in your butt".
Earl: You can't argue with that logic.
Little Chubby: Yeah, well, if he was so smart he wouldn't have ended up with a hole in his head where the vodka should've been.
Season 3
Earl: Where is everybody, we've gone 10 blocks and haven't seen a soul.
Donny: Maybe they're hiding.
Randy: Marco? Polo!
Joy: Were not in the damn pool, you idiot! Olly olly oxen free!
Donny: Maybe they're hiding.
Randy: Marco? Polo!
Joy: Were not in the damn pool, you idiot! Olly olly oxen free!
Glenn: I'm gonna rip out your hair, put it in a jar and, I don't know, mail it to the pope! With a salmon.
Joy: As you can see I have a black son and a white son, but I don't see race so I can't tell which is which.