Don Draper: By love you mean big lightning bolts to the heart, where you can't eat and you can't work, and you just run off and get married and make babies. The reason you haven't felt is because it doesn't exist. What you call love was invented by guys like me...to sell nylons.

Don Draper: You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one.

Don Draper: Advertising is based on one thing, happiness. And you know what happiness is? Happiness is the smell of a new car. It's freedom from fear. It's a billboard on the side of the road that screams reassurance that whatever you are doing is okay. You are okay.

Joan Holloway: He may act like he wants a secretary, but most of the time they're looking for something between a mother and a waitress. And the rest of the time, well... Go home, take a paper bag and cut some eye holes out of it. Put if over your head, look in the mirror and try and evaluate your strengths and weaknesses. And try and be honest.

Don Draper: We should get married.
Midge Daniels: You think I'd make a good ex-wife?

Don Draper: Let me ask you something, what do women want?
Roger Sterling: Who cares?

Roger Sterling: Psychiatry is just this year's candy pink stove.

Betty Draper: [To her psychiatrist] I don't know why I'm here. I mean, I do, I'm nervous, I guess. Anxious. I don't sleep that well. And my hands. They're fine now, it's like when you have a problem with your car and you go to a mechanic and it's not doing it anymore. Not that you're a mechanic. I guess a lot of people must come here worried about the bomb. Is that true? It's a common nightmare, people say. I read it in a magazine. My mother always told me that it wasn't polite to talk about yourself. She passed away recently. I guess I already said that.

Roger Sterling: You know what? I am very comfortable with my mind. Thoughts clean and unclean, loving and... the opposite of that. But I am not a woman. And I think it behooves any man to toss all female troubles into the hands of a stranger.

Paul Kinsey: Sterling Cooper is positively Cro-Magnon. I have a friend - I'm not even going to say what agency - but all they do is smoke Mary Jane and play darts. And honestly, I think they're the best store on the street.

Rachel Menken: It's hard to get caught in a lie.
Don Draper: It wasn't a lie, it was ineptitude with insufficient cover.

Roger Sterling: I bet there were people in the Bible walking around, complaining about "kids today."
Don Draper: Kids today, they have no one to look up to. 'Cause they're looking up to us.

Pete Campbell: I have ideas.
Don Draper: I'm sure you do. Sterling Cooper has more failed artists and intellectuals than the Third Reich.

Roger Sterling: I bet daily friendship with that bottle attracts more people to advertising than any salary you can dream of.
Don Draper: It's the way I got in.
Roger Sterling: So enjoy it.
Don Draper: I'm doin' my best here.
Roger Sterling: No, you're not. You don't know how to drink. Your whole generation, you drink for the wrong reasons. My generation, we drink because it's good, because it feels better than unbuttoning your collar, because we deserve it. We drink because it's what men do.
Don Draper: What about shaky hands, I see a lot of that with you boys?
Roger Sterling: No joke. Your kind with your gloomy thoughts and your worries, you're all busy licking some imaginary wound.
Don Draper: Not all imaginary.
Roger Sterling: Yeah, boo hoo.
Don Draper: Maybe I'm not as comfortable being powerless as you are.

Roger Sterling: What you did is totally unacceptable.
Pete Campbell: I realize that.
Roger Sterling: I want you to be very clear about this: You were fired. I wanted you out. Cooper wanted you out. And you would be...if it weren't for this man. [motions to Don] He thought you deserved another chance. That's right. He fought for you.
Pete Campbell: I don't know what to say.
Roger Sterling: Say nothing. You are here because of Don Draper's largess.
Pete Campbell: Thank you. Thank you so much.
Roger Sterling: Now, I know that your generation went to college instead of serving, so I'll illuminate you. This man is your commanding officer. You live and die in his shadow. Understood?
Pete Campbell: [nods vigorously] I won't let you down, Don.
Roger Sterling: Jesus! Campbell...don't ever say that.