Ellie: Morgan Grimes, the boy who took my pillow as his date to the junior prom, knows more about my family being spies than I do.

Ellie: My dad's work is so amazing. I've never seen such creative use of neuroplasticity before. His mind is incredible!
Awesome: That's probably where Clara gets it. She said "arthroscopic" yesterday.
Ellie: Honey, if Clara can say "arthroscopic" she needs to stop pooping her pants.

Ellie: The problem is, I only have one test subject, so in order to control my experiment, we're going have to have a second baby. [Devon freezes] Joking.

Ellie: There's no need. I figured it out. I know.
Chuck: You do?
Ellie: You haven't had a girlfriend for a long time and you're in love.
Chuck: Yeah. I am?
Ellie: But lying to me? Missing our most important day like...like you're in high school? I mean do you even know that Morgan's about to be fired?
Chuck: Ellie, I can't apologize enough. I...everything that you're saying is right. I guess that I'm just so, um, I'm so head over heals that I'm not thinking straight, you know?
Ellie: Listen, I know that this is the first big thing to happen to you in while. And you feel like your life's not going anywhere, your job's not either, and you're not Superman out there saving the day. But your a good person and your a good brother and you're a good friend. Don't lose that.

Ellie: Well, what happened? What went wrong?
Chuck: I guess something that's been wrong from the start. You know?
Ellie: Are... you guys aren't breaking up, are you?
Chuck: No, no, no, no, no. Trust me. Sarah's not going anywhere.
Ellie: Chuck, I guess I, I don't--I don't know what you're saying exactly.
Chuck: Look El, I know how much you love Sarah. And I know how much you love the idea of us, and us moving forward with you and Devon, but we're not anything like you guys.
Ellie: But you guys seem so perfect.
Chuck: Yeah, I know. I guess, but being in that house with her, it was so close to being perfect. The way I had pictured it would be. Then I realized what was wrong with that picture... And it was us. Sarah and I are never going to be anything more than we are now. But you know what? I'm okay with that.

Ellie: What we need to be is more like Chuck and Sarah.
Chuck: Excuse me?
Ellie: Every time you see her your eyes light up. I mean, How do you keep that spark alive?
Chuck: I-I, you know-I don't think I should be getting involved in-
Awesome: Come on, what's the secret bro?
Chuck: You know what, we-we kinda just, you know, we pretend like we're not really dating, which is weird I know, but it-it-it forces me to have win her over again and again...and again.
Ellie: That is so sweet.

Ellie:This isn't about you, Chuck. This is about us. We need a place for two. And you can get a roommate, you know. You have plenty of friends.
Morgan: I'm so happy right now!
Ellie: Other friends, Chuck. Other friends.

Emmett: Let's start out simple: why do you belong at the Buy More?
Jeff: I satisfy a quota. My dad's part Indian. The cool kind of Indian, though, not like Lester.

Fulcrum Agent: Okay, let's try this one more time. The microchip. Please. The microchip now!
Bryce: Release the kid first.
Chuck: Kid? Honestly, we were born in the same year!

General Beckman: Agent Walker, despite your heroism, you have directly disobeyed several orders...
Chuck: Wait, General, um, I'm sorry but, but isn't the most important part of being my handler making sure I stay alive?
Sarah: It's okay, Chuck.
Casey: No, it's not.
[Everyone looks at Casey]
Casey: Let him finish.
Chuck: Thanks... Um, General. What I'm trying to say is that because my relationship with Sarah is so... you know, we're, we're close. We care about each other. That's-- that's what I'm trying to say. And-- and I know it's not protocol or whatever but it's those feelings that wound up saving my life.

General Beckman: Colonel Casey, after the Yves St. Laurent incident, you will obviously have to sit this one out.
Casey: [quietly to himself] Stab one guy with a stilleto...

General Beckman: How would you feel about working on the new Intersect project? Your government has been building its own Intersect. You've shown real promise. We'd like you to be an analyst. Your country is calling you, Mr. Bartowski.
Chuck: Uh, well then I think my country might have the wrong number. 'Cause I'm just Chuck Bartowski, not a hero.

General Beckman: Mr. Barker, I understand you were hurt protecting Agent Walker. I am told you showed great courage.
Barker: Just doing my job, General. Actually, it was Chuck who showed great courage on this mission. He was also injured.
Casey: He got clipped by a windowsill. It's as pathetic as it sounds.

General Beckman: One of our agents was killed in Milan last night while he was tracking this woman: Sofia Stepanova. [Beckman flashes photos of a scantily clad Stepanova]
Chuck: Heyo. Who do we have taking our surveillance pics? Because those are tremendous! Can you see the way...
[Sarah gives him a look]
Chuck: What? No, no, no, no, I'm just saying, clearly...is she in a bathing suit? I didn't even notice that the first time.
General Beckman: We can all acknowledge that Ms. Stepanova is quite...fetching.

General Beckman: Our most valuable secrets have been sent to an idiot.
Director Graham: At least they weren't sent to his friend.