Booth: You don't seem too upset about missing Christmas.
Brennan: Indications are that Christ, if he existed, was born in late spring, and the celebration of his birth was shifted to coincide with the pagan rite of the winter solstice so that early Christians weren't persecuted.
Booth: What are you, like, the Christmas killer?
Brennan: It's the truth.
Booth: No, it sounds like the truth because it's so rational, right? But the... you know, the true truth is you hate Christmas, so you just spout out all these facts and you ruin it for everyone else.
Brennan: I ruin the true truth with facts?

Booth: You have the right to appeal.
Brennan': To whom? Cullen? I'm pretty sure he doesn't like me.
Booth: I'm pretty sure you're right.

Booth: You know what? You're the only smart person I really like.
Brennan: Thank you!

Booth: You know, evolution is long, long process. It takes hundreds of years.
Brennan: Thousands.
Booth: Why do you always have to correct me?
Brennan: To help you evolve.

Booth: You know, I'm sorry for wrecking your weekend for nothing.
Brennan: No, not for nothing.
Booth: Ah, you know what I mean. You know all that running around it didn't change anything. Epps was guilty. He was always guilty.
Brennan: There was doubt. We had an obligation to respect that doubt. We all share in the death of every human being.
Booth: Very poetic.
Brennan: No, very literal. We all share DNA. (very earnestly) When I look at a bone it's not some artifact that I can separate from myself. It's a part of a person who got here the same way I did. It should never be easy to take someone's life. I don't care who it is. (Booth stares at her intently for a long while) What? (he continues to stare and a smile begins to form on his lips) What?
Booth: You know you've been practicing your Nobel prize speech just a little too much.

Booth: You know, if this works, I'm gonna buy you a puppy.
Brennan: That would be inadvisable.

Booth: You know, if you had a pet pig, what would you name him?
Brennan: [looking at him as though the answer is obvious] Jasper.

Booth: You know, when I was a kid, Bones, I always wanted to be a hobo. I wanted to ride the rails, play the guitar --
Brennan: Be malnourished, riddled with preventable disease.
Booth: You know what? You could make Santa Claus cry. You really could.
Brennan: Hey, you're wearing your belt buckled again! Cocky.
Booth: Yeah. Ever since the whole coma thing I just kept staring at it thinking to myself, why would I wear something like this?
Brennan: Because you love it. You always have.
Booth: Yeah, that's what I landed on, Bones.
Brennan: Oh, well I'm glad you did, because I like it. It's Boothy.
Booth: Boothy?

Booth: You know, you look very mom-like with that baby monitor.
Brennan: I have a responsibility under state law as a foster parent. I've already bought him toys and clothes.
Booth: Ah. So you've bought him some clothes?
Brennan: Well, I sent an intern, who apparently loves bears, which in reality would devour a small child.

Booth: You know, you need a better screening process down at the museum.
Goodman: Ironic, given we contract that out to the FBI.

Booth: You never told her [you loved her]?
Teddy: I was twenty. It was hard.
Booth: I. Love. You. It's three words, really not that hard.
Teddy: What, you've never loved somebody and didn't say it to 'em? (Booth is silent) See, maybe that's why I'm here: to get you to say "I love you" to somebody.

Booth: You never told me the second reason why you bet on me.
Brennan': Well, it's silly.
Booth: No, try me.
Brennan: Beginner's luck. I haven't lost anything since I've been here. And I... I figured if I bet on you...
Booth: I couldn't lose.
Brennan: Sounds silly, right?
Booth: Sounds familiar. Thanks.
Brennan: You're welcome.

Booth: You put a hit out on my partner?
Ortez: She's not FBI.
Booth: [punches him in the face, grabs him and points his gun right at his throat] I never said anything about the FBI. She's my partner, see. And if anything happens to her, I will find you and I will kill you. I won't think twice. Come here, look in my eyes. [pushes barrel of the gun into his mouth and cocks it] Look at my face. If anything happens to her, I will kill you. This is between you and me, and nobody sees, nobody knows.

Booth: You really want to help? I got a great idea. What do you say we talk about something else? Let's talk about you.
Brennan: [pause] My breasts are very sore. Would you mind if I spent the evening naked?
Booth: Sure, yeah that's fine with me. No complaints here, that's great. See, now, isn't this a better conversation?

Booth: You want me to what?
Brennan: Stab the body for me. We need to match force with the injuries recorded on the remains.
Booth: Okay, I'm stabbing the body.
Brennan: It's a replica. We're all going to do it. You're just the closest to Kyle Richardson.
Booth: Okay, you know what? That's great. I'll be there in twenty. But in the future you just got to ask me differently, Bones, because you know what? Come over to your place to stab a body? That is just freaky.