Charlie [to Mandi]: When Alan was eight, I convinced him he only had two weeks to live. But I suppose that tells you more about me than him.
Alan: Yeah, good times. But back to recent events--
Charlie: Ooh, ooh! Remember when I told you the cat litter box was filled with almond roca? He ate four of them. [Mandi laughs]
Alan: Are we done visiting Charlie Harper's Museum of Sibling Cruelty?

  »   More Quotes from Two and a Half Men
  »   Back to the TV Quotes Database