[everyone at the vegetarian restaurant is staring at Charlie and Mia]
Charlie: Well, good! Maybe now you know how I feel, sitting in a restaurant eating medallions of bean curd with lawnmower sauce! Am I right? No man should have to eat anything with the word "curd" in it!
Mia: You know, you're turning into a real ass here!
Charlie: Well, then, I'm finally living up to my potential. [Mia leaves] I'm a big ol' bourbon-soaked, cigar-humping ass, as God in His infinite wisdom meant me to be. As He meant all men to be! [one person claps but everyone else is silent] You guys are disappointing God.

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