Mrs. Wolowitz: [as Howard is unlocking the front door] Who's there!? Are you a sex criminal!?
Howard: Sex criminals don't have keys, Ma! [goes inside]
Mrs. Wolowitz: Where were you so late!?
Howard: I was out with Bernadette!
Mrs. Wolowitz: I know what that means! I watch Dr. Phil! [short pause] I hope to God you used a condom!
Howard: I'm not having this conversation with you, Ma!
Mrs. Wolowitz: God forbid you get one of those new fancy sex diseases!
Howard: Nobody has a disease!
Mrs. Wolowitz: I hope not! I share a toilet with you! Is that what you want!? To give your mother herbies!?
Howard: That's it! I don't have to take this! [comes back outside, yelling at the front door] And good luck with your eyebrows in the morning!
[He starts to leave, then goes back to the door and unlocks it again]
Mrs. Wolowitz: Who's there!? Are you a sex criminal!?
Howard: [going back inside] Still leaving; I just forgot my Claritin!
Howard: Sex criminals don't have keys, Ma! [goes inside]
Mrs. Wolowitz: Where were you so late!?
Howard: I was out with Bernadette!
Mrs. Wolowitz: I know what that means! I watch Dr. Phil! [short pause] I hope to God you used a condom!
Howard: I'm not having this conversation with you, Ma!
Mrs. Wolowitz: God forbid you get one of those new fancy sex diseases!
Howard: Nobody has a disease!
Mrs. Wolowitz: I hope not! I share a toilet with you! Is that what you want!? To give your mother herbies!?
Howard: That's it! I don't have to take this! [comes back outside, yelling at the front door] And good luck with your eyebrows in the morning!
[He starts to leave, then goes back to the door and unlocks it again]
Mrs. Wolowitz: Who's there!? Are you a sex criminal!?
Howard: [going back inside] Still leaving; I just forgot my Claritin!
Mrs. Wolowitz : [as Howard is unlocking the front door] Who's there!? Are you a sex criminal!?
Howard : Sex criminals don't have keys, Ma! [goes inside]
Mrs. Wolowitz : Where were you so late!?
Howard : I was out with Bernadette!
Mrs. Wolowitz : I know what that means! I watch Dr. Phil! [short pause] I hope to God you used a condom!
Howard : I'm not having this conversation with you, Ma!
Mrs. Wolowitz : God forbid you get one of those new fancy sex diseases!
Howard : Nobody has a disease!
Mrs. Wolowitz : I hope not! I share a toilet with you! Is that what you want!? To give your mother herbies!?
Howard : That's it! I don't have to take this! [comes back outside, yelling at the front door] And good luck with your eyebrows in the morning!
[He starts to leave, then goes back to the door and unlocks it again]
Mrs. Wolowitz : Who's there!? Are you a sex criminal!?
Howard : [going back inside] Still leaving; I just forgot my Claritin!
http://www.tv-quotes.com/shows/the-big-bang-theory/quote_20973.html
