Oz quotes

189 total quotes



All Seasons
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Burrano: Donald Groves. You killed your parents and ate them, right?
Groves: I only ate my mom. I was saving my dad for Thanksgiving.
Burrano: That's festive.

Burrano: No? He's ordering you around all day, "boy do this, boy do that", it never pissed you off?
Keane: He never called me "boy".

Busmalis: (regarding Kosygin) I tried talking to him at dinner, and he just stared at me, frozen like the tundra. He scares the living shit out of me.

Busmalis: Relax. You're suffering from PBS.
Rebadow: PBS?
Busmalis: Pre-Bunny Syndrome. It happens quite often in my line of work. You dig and dig and dig, and just before you have to make like a little bunny and go through the hole, you panic.
Rebadow: This is real? Pre-Bunny Syndrome?
Busmalis: Oh, yeah. I mean, I made the name up, but sure.

Busmalis: You're a Russian?
Nikolai: Yes.
Busmalis: From Russia?
Nikolai: Yes.
Busmalis: You were born in Russia?
Nikolai: (annoyed) Yes!

Case: Ryan O'Reily. Vehicular manslaughter, reckless endangerment, possession of controlled substances, possession of a deadly weapon, violation of parole. That's an amazing list of crimes.
O'Reily: Well, you know, I applied myself.

Case: You can't have it both ways, governor! If the prisoners are guilty, so are you.
Devlin: This is not the attitude I expect from my next Attorney-General.
Case: You know something. I don't want to be Attorney-General. I want to be GOVERNOR!
Devlin: What?
Case: I'll see you on the campaign trail, Devlin.

Chris Keller: Show me your tits.
Sister Pete: Don't do that.
Chris Keller: Sorry.

Coushaine: I say we institute a "no swearing" rule.
El Cid: Fuck you.
Hill: Suck my dick.
Wangler: Asswipe.
O'Reily: Cocksucker.
Pancamo: You stupid cunt.
Hoyt: Putz.
McManus: If nobody has anything more intelligent to say, this meeting is adjourned.

Cyril O'Reilly: We don't choose God. God chooses us.

Cyril: (As He is in the Electric Chair and the Hood is pulled over His Face)Mom what happening? What are They doing? Ryan? Ryan!

Dr. Gloria Nathan: You may have breast cancer.
O'Reily: (laughs) That's funny.
Dr. Gloria Nathan: I'm not joking.
O'Reily: Breast cancer? Girls get breast cancer.
Dr. Gloria Nathan: Men do too. It's rare, especially at your age, but it does happen.
O'Reily: I'm not a fag, you know. I've been in this shithole for over a year, and I ain't ever taken it up the ass!
Dr. Gloria Nathan: No one is saying that you have!
O'Reily: Bullshit! You're telling me I've got a chick's disease!
Dr. Gloria Nathan: Men have breasts, the same as women.
O'Reily: What the fuck you talking about? I ain't got breasts, I got a chest! (pulls open his shirt) See it? Huh, see it?!

Dr. Gloria Nathan: You're HIV-positive.
Napa: What?!
Dr. Gloria Nathan: I'm sorry.
Napa: Doctor, that is not possible. Correct me if I'm wrong, but the only way to get AIDS is by having sex or sharing a needle. Well I ain't done either and I'm not Asian!

Dr. Prestopnik: You have to take something, or you'll die!
Said: Oh believe me, doctor, I have no intention of dying!

El Cid: You know, I want Alvarez dead. I don't know why. It's like this itch that I can't scratch.