Radar: The sun in it's crimson radiance bids a crepuscular adieu to another day. Corporal Klinger was in his last grisly hour of guard duty little knowing the fate that destiny had planned up for him. The Chinese were giving up in hordes. Sergeant Fierman brought in three prisoners that he had captured after they had surrendered voluntarily. The sergeant bragadeered to Corporal Klinger that capturing prisoners meant points toward discharge and early homeward bounding. This information inspired Klinger a whole lot. The vainglorious corporal ran like a bird and sped off in quest of Chinese giver-uppers. But destiny exterminated his luck. The Chinese had not seen women in an overexcited period of time. Klinger barely escaped with his purity still clean and in the process, ruining his finest frockery. The corporal re-arrived with his dignity dented and his nonchalantness not so nifty.
Potter: Enough, boy! Enough! This whole unit is gonna get a Section Eight!

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