Landry: Have you ever read the book The Giving Tree?
Tyra: Yeah, when I was like five.
Landry: It's about this tree who loves this boy more than anything, right? And the boy just takes and takes and takes until there's absolutely nothing left but a stump. And I'm like the tree and you're the boy - just take and take and take, and there's absolutely nothing left Tyra. That's exactly what I feel like. Just a stump. Because this is not a friendship. You're selfish. It's not a friendship.

Landry: Hey I was sorry to hear about your friend Calvin.
Vince: What do you care? You don't even know his last name.
Landry: Calvin Brown. And I care about my teammates, and you're my teammate.

Landry: I don't want to step on your fingers or anything but you might want to slice those a little thinner because cucumber sandwiches are pretty delicate.
Tyra: Really?
Landry: Did I just lose a lot of man points for that?
Tyra: Yeah you did.
Landry: Did I tell you I'm in a band though?
Tyra: See that's like 40,000 man points right there.

Landry: I'm pullin' over.
Tyra: Why?
Landry: Because it's the Christian thing to do.
Tyra: [to Lyla] Oh, hey, cheating cheerleader bitch. Wanna ride?

Landry: I'm sorry man.
Matt: You should be man, you suck. We've been working on this for a while and you still suck.
Landry: Not at all I was talking about...
Matt: They're giving us a death gratuity.
Landry: A death gratuity?
Matt: Yeah it's like 100 thousand dollars.
Landry: Does it come in a tip jar?

Landry: Matt, that's the thing. You're not listening to me. If you look at a girl like a geometry proof the answer is just right in front of you. It's your job to find the missing variable. You gotta solve for x.
Matt: Yeah, um, that's actually algebra.
Landry: That's actually not the point.

Landry: Mrs. Taylor, can I ask you like...can I talk to you a second?
Tami: Sure.
Landry: I'm starting to feel like I have some sort of repellent that repels females away and sends them running.
Tami: Mmhmm.
Landry: I was in love with Tyra for a long time and I chased her away and then there was another girl and I completely chased her away...it was a lot quicker.
Tami: Here's the thing, and I know it's probably not easy to see here in Dillon, but you are at the beginning of your life. A lot of these football heroes around here, they're not gonna get much farther than this. But you're gonna go to some great college and have a career that you love. And I'm telling you right now, women are gonna flock to you. I know it's hard to believe, but that's how it's gonna work. You're a good person and this is just the beginning. I'm right one hundred percent of the time. You can ask my husband.

Landry: Please tell me the lesson you've learned.
Matt: Always lock the door.
Landry: When having sex with the Coach's daughter.

Landry: Tyra is that you, what are you doing here?
Tyra: Nothing just wishing I could build a time machine and go back and shoot who ever it is that invented Algebra, that's for sure.
Landry: Well, see that's kind of a Catch-22, though because in order to invent that time machine you may need to use Algebra.

Landry: Tyra, do you want to remind me again why Mindy thinks that it's a good idea to have a party outside in December?
Tyra: Yeah, remind me again why my sister thinks it's a good idea to marry Billy Riggins?
Landry: That is a good point.
Tyra: That's a really good point.

Landry: Why don't you go punch him in the face?
Matt: Oh, is that what you would do?
Landry: In some situations you need to ask yourself, W.W.R.D.? What Would Riggins Do? In this situation?
Matt: Riggins would not be in this situation 'cause Riggins is captain of the S.S. Ta-Tas over there.

Landry: You know what it is? He's probably all messed up from the war. That's exactly what it--he's gone war crazy with Operation Freedom flashbacks and stuff.
Julie: He's not war crazy. He's just--He should see you play, I mean, if you get him to one of the games he'll understand what all of the fuss is about.
Matt: Yeah, I guess, maybe.
Julie: Well is he gonna help you get some in-home care for your grandma?
Matt: Well, yeah, he's gonna straighten all of that out. I mean--I mean, really, this is a perfect time for him to come home because clearly I can't get it done.

Landry: You obviously don't believe any of what you're saying.
Tyra: Fine Landry, why don't you tell me what to write?
Landry: I don't, this is your essay, I don't...
Tyra: What, should I write about? My trashy family, about the fact that my sister's a stripper, or my mom is a high school drop out who drinks boxes of wine like it's water? Or about the fact that I lost my virginity when I was thirteen, or the fact that my papa wasn't around? How about that? Oh, I know. I could write about how up until two years ago I had enough hate in my heart to start a freaking car.
Landry: What changed?
Tyra: What?
Landry: What changed? Why did you stop having enough hate in your heart to start a freaking car?
Tyra: Jason Street got paralyzed. I realized that he was this great guy - this hero, and it happened to him. It made me realize that life isn't fair for anybody. Not just me.

Leach: Hey, do you know how to get to Lubbock?
Coach Taylor: You gotta take 61 up to 23.
Leach: Hey, Dillon East, right? You're the coach at Dillon East. You've lost your inner pirate. Uh, have you ever heard swing your sword? You're supposed to swing your sword like this, but you're swinging yours like this. You've got to find your inner pirate. A lot of times things just happen for a reason. We don't know why God wants it that way, but you can't make the best out of it until you get back your inner pirate. You might be the luckiest man alive and not even know it.

Lyla: [discussing college] Did you really get in?
Tim: Yeah, only Riggins to get in, probably the last.
Lyla: I knew you would.
'Tim: I'm in because of you. [Leans in to kiss Lyla] Oh wow. Mmm...are you on a bender right now? I almost got a buzz off your breath there just now. Like, I don't think it's safe for me to drive right now. And for me to say that - it's a lot.
Lyla: I'm sorry...
Tim: Don't be. It's fantastic. [kisses her] I'll get drunk with you. I'm on board.