Booth: Do you have a dog, Bones?
Brennan: I always wanted a pig...
Booth: A pig?
Brennan: Very smart, despite the popular misconception, very clean.

Booth: Do you own a gun, Mr. Ceraficki?
Ceraficki: Of course, I own a gun! This is a pawn shop! I never have to use it. I mean, I wave it around from time to time, but --
Brenna: Why is he allowed to carry a guy after being arrested on a concealed weapon charge?!
Ceraficki: Innocent mistake. I accidentally put it in my pocket, you know, when I left work.
Booth: Could I see the gun, please?
Ceraficki: She's right over here.
Booth: Real easy there, pal! I don't want any sudden movements. No mistakes. That's it.
Inagawa: That is very sexy! Big Andy with a gun, protecting Kathy!
Brennan: No, no. He is not Andy and I am not Kathy. [smiles] It's even more exciting when he shoots someone with it.
Booth: Bones.
Brennan: Well, it is, Booth, and it's very impressive! He never misses.
Inagawa: Andy sometimes misses!
Brennan: Yes! See?

Booth: Don't fire Max. You know, let him keep his job. He's a teacher, not a janitor.
Brennan: I can't overlook the sanctity of the forensic lab, Booth.
Booth: Yeah. Maybe you can overlook it for me.
Brennan: For you?
Booth: Yeah. Personal favor.
Brennan: Like a partner thing?
Booth: [smiles] Partner thing.
Brennan: [smiles] I know you, Booth. You're trying to do me a favor by telling me it's a favor for you.

Booth: Don't we have some stabbing to do?
Angela: Yes. I hate my job.

Booth: Dr Brennan, she's pretty good at making dead people tell her things.

Booth: Dr. Wyatt.
Wyatt': Ah, Agent Booth is it? Yes, Gordon. Gordon Wyatt. (extends his hand to Booth but instead of his hand Booth pulls out a piece of paper from his back pocket)
Booth: Great. You the shrink?
Wyatt: Shrink, yes, meaning psychiatrist.
Booth: That's great, Doc. How's about you just sign my piece of paper here and I'll get back to work, right?
Wyatt: Certainly. (Booth hands him a pen) No, no, I have a pen. Do you mind if I ask what exactly it was that you did?
Booth: Yeah, I shot a truck.
Wyatt: Ah, full of terrorists no doubt or plutonium or fleeing felons, was it?
Booth: Nah, it was an ice cream truck.
Wyatt: You have a good reason for firing on it?
Booth: Yeah, the music, it was bothering me.
Wyatt: Ah.
Booth: Yeah, there was a speaker in the clown's mouth? Yeah, I just pulled out my gun, you know, bum-bum-bum. It was gone.
Wyatt: (folding the paper without signing it) So, the FBI sent you to me because you shot a clown?
Booth: Not a real clown.
Wyatt: (handing Booth the paper back) I suggest you cogitate on the underlying reasons why you shot that clown while I make us some tea. (goes into the house)
Booth: Cogitate? Tea

Booth: FBI!
Suspect: US Marshals!
Booth: US Marshals?
Brennan: Forensic anthropologist! That's why no gun.

Booth: Fishing is not a sport!
Brennan: What? Monuments to sporting events in ancient Egypt include fishing, as well as swimming and wrestling.
Booth: Come on! No sweat, no sport!
Brennan: Well -- oh! Boris Spassky at chess. He used to perspire profusely.
Booth: Why do you got to make things so complicated? Let me break it down for you, okay? Basketball, football, hockey: that's a sport. Board games, fishing: not a sport!
Cam: You'll probably go easy on the fried food after this one.
Brennan: Well, the International Olympic Committee is considering adding chess as a sport.
Cam: Not a sport.
Booth: See! Not a sport!
Cam: Neither is ribbon twirling, bridge or synchronized swimming.
Booth: Synchronized swimming, that's not a sport, that's for sure.
Cam: Oh, God. I'm in the middle of something, aren't I? Oh, look! Dead guy!
Booth: Yeah, look at that. The Colonel's not going to like this one.
Cam: Male, no sign of clothing, all other stats still unknown. He was found at the bottom of this grease receptical by those lovely gentleman over there.
Brennan: The remains are covered in flesh. Why am I here?
Cam: I don't know. I told Booth. Oh, God. In the middle again!

Booth: God does not make mistakes.
Angela: I don't know - putting testicles on the outside doesn't seem like such a good idea.

Booth: God doesn't make mistakes.
Angela: Mmm, I don't know. Putting testicles on the outside didn't seem like such a great idea. [Booth nods in reluctant agreement.]

Booth: Great. Now he's ignoring us in two languages.

Booth: He's definitely twitchy about something.
Brennan: What if he is escaping out the back door?
Booth: You don't spend a lot of time in trailers, do you?

Booth: Here we are, all of us, basically alone, separate creatures just circling each other, all searching for that slightest hint of a real connection. Some look in the wrong places. Some, they just give up hope because in their mind, they're thinking "Oh, there's nobody out there for me." But all of us, we keep trying, over and over again. Why? Because, every once in a while... every once in a while, two people meet, and there's that spark. And yes, Bones, he's handsome, and she's beautiful, and maybe that's all they see at first. But making love... making love... that's when two people become one.
Brennan: It is scientifically impossible for two objects to occupy the same space.
Booth: Yeah, but what's important is we try. And when we do it right, we get close.
Brennan: To what? Breaking the laws of physics?
Booth: Yeah, Bones. A miracle... Those people -- role-playing, and their fetishes, and their little sex games. It's crappy sex, at least compared to the real thing.
Brennan: You're right
Booth: Yeah, but I ...[laughing] Oh, wait a second. I just won that argument?
Brennan: Yep.

Booth: Hey Bones, what're you doing this weekend?
Brennan: I've got plans.
Booth': Come on, I'm serious.
Brennan: Between your girlfriend, the corporate lawyer, and the defense lawyer on the side your weekend must be completely booked. What is your thing with lawyers?

Booth: Hey! You got anything?
Caroline: We've been checking on the hospitals and morgues for stabbing victims within a 50miles radius where Jane Doe was found, we've got nothing!
Booth: Yeah, well, I've got something. You know the bloody money that we found on the girl, assuming she stole it from the victim..this..[types the computer]..could be good news.
Caroline: You're cute when you try to make me happy.
Booth: Right..[hits one of the computer keys, image comes out in the screen] Look at that, look at all the 20 dollar bills.
Caroline: [looking at the computer screen] Okay..and what's that? [pointing to another image beside the bills]
Booth: I don't know what that is, we found it in her pocket. Angela's gonna reconstruct..but take a look at the serial numbers on the bills.
Caroline: They're sequential. Bank robbery?
Booth:No, ATM. ATMs get sequential bills from the banks. We can trace the number to the ATM, we should be able to find our victim.
Caroline: Now you're just downright handsome! [Booth smirks]