Arrested Development quotes
177 total quotesOscar: God willing, he'll fail boot camp.
Michael: Well, why wouldn't he? He already failed day camp.
Michael: Well, why wouldn't he? He already failed day camp.
Sitwell: The only thing I ask is, out of the 450 homes we build, one be given to a disadvantaged family from the inner city.
Gob: That's great. So the other 449 families live in fear? Is that what we're saying?
Gob: That's great. So the other 449 families live in fear? Is that what we're saying?
Tobias: [after Michael asks Tobias to buy a tape recorder to record himself speaking] You know, Michael, perhaps I should buy you that tape recorder. Do you have any idea how often you say the word "afraid"?
Michael: Well, I know I did in the jacuzzi.
Tobias: And I apologize for that. I thought it was a pool toy.
Michael: Well, I know I did in the jacuzzi.
Tobias: And I apologize for that. I thought it was a pool toy.
Tobias: Here he comes. Here comes John Wayne. [imitating John Wayne] I'm not gonna cry about my Pa. I'm gonna build an airport. Put my name on it. [speaking normally] Why, Michael? So you can fly away from your feelings?
Tobias: My wife is humiliated. This is my chance to right the small wrong that I did.
Michael: You shot her in the ass with about four ounces of horse tranquilizer.
Tobias: I haven't been the perfect husband -- yes, I admit that. But now is my chance to be a hero.
Michael: You shot her in the ass with about four ounces of horse tranquilizer.
Tobias: I haven't been the perfect husband -- yes, I admit that. But now is my chance to be a hero.
Tobias: Well, Michael, you really are quite the Cupid, aren't you? I tell you, you can sink your arrow into my buttocks any time.
Michael: Okay, you know what you do? You buy yourself a tape recorder, you just record yourself for a whole day. I think you're going to be surprised at some of your phrasing.
Tobias: Butterscotch! Want a lick?
Michael: Okay, you know what you do? You buy yourself a tape recorder, you just record yourself for a whole day. I think you're going to be surprised at some of your phrasing.
Tobias: Butterscotch! Want a lick?
Tobias: You know, Lindsay, as a therapist, I have advised... a number of couples to explore an open relationship where the couple remains emotionally committed but free to explore extramarital encounters.
Lindsay: Well, did it work for those people?
Tobias: No, it never does. I mean, these people somehow delude themselves into thinking it might, but... but it might work for us.
Lindsay: Well, did it work for those people?
Tobias: No, it never does. I mean, these people somehow delude themselves into thinking it might, but... but it might work for us.
Tobias: You know, mother Lucille, there's a psychological concept known as denial that I believe you're evincing. It's when a thought is so hateful that the mind literally rejects it.
Lucille: You are a worse psychiatrist than you are a son-in-law, and you will never get work as an actor because you have no talent.
Tobias: Well, if she's not going to say anything, I certainly can't help her.
Lucille: You are a worse psychiatrist than you are a son-in-law, and you will never get work as an actor because you have no talent.
Tobias: Well, if she's not going to say anything, I certainly can't help her.
Tobias:I know you're the big marriage expert. Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot your wife is dead! [beat] I'm sorry, that was 100% inappropriate and I do apologize profusely. I'm, oh...