McGee: The August 1928 issue of Amazing Stories first stirred the national imagination. It featured the Skylark of Space on the cover, and then you've got Buck Rogers.
Abby: What's really amazing is how much more fascinating jet-pack trivia gets the eleventh time you've heard it.

McGee: The Palestinians last location is a thousand miles south of D.C. Now every minor and major airport between has their photos posted. I've got alerts at the train stations, bus stations, local L.E.O.s up and down the coast, as well as all hardware shipments, commercial or military. I have hung a net.
Ziva: I do not know who Annette is or why you are so proud of killing her.
McGee: No, what I mean is, when they make a move I'll know about it.

McGee: The victim is a naval reservist. Lieutenant Jason Simms, 44, from Fairfax. Witnesses say he was swerving all over the road, clearly drunk, pulled off onto the shoulder over there.
Gibbs: Did you get a time?
McGee: A little over three hours ago.
Ducky: Tony? [holds man's wristwatch up so Tony can take a photograph] 4:19 to be precise. The truck tapped his wrist, apparently.
Ziva: Being drunk is one thing, but why would he have crossed the road?
Tony: Suppressing chicken joke in three, two --

McGee: Well, he sounds serious.
Gibbs: No kidding.

McGee: Well, if it isn't T-Cadd.
Tony: What?
McGee: T-Cadd. It's what I'm calling you guys now. You know, the cute couples contraction? Tom-Kat, Bennifer, Brangelina.
Tony: Yeah, we got it McBitter.
McGee: You two are wearing the same suit, even. [they smile]
McCadden: Building security found the body. No blood, it looks like he was dumped. Multiple stab wounds to the back. We've definitely got a fifth victim.
Tony: Wounds on his arm, chest. This guy wasn't easy to take out.
McGee: He put up a fight.
McCadden: Killer had to be strong, we're probably looking for a male.
Tony: Or Ziva. [they laugh]

McGee: What is with this music?
Abby: I am playing it out of respect for Kate.
McGee: Well, I thought you were from New Orleans.
Abby: So?
McGee: Well don't they play Jazz at funerals?
Abby: Coming from the cemetery, after the body has been buried. On the way to the cemetary we play a dirge. Do you know what a dirge is, Timmy?
McGee: Creepy music?
Abby: Can you go back to the squad room and let me do my job?
McGee: I can't.
Abby: Why?
McGee: Gibbs...Gibbs told me to watch over you.
Abby: Ohhh�� (It looks like Abby is mad) That is so sweet!

McGee: Who would want to impersonate Tony?
Ziva: Perhaps Jack Nicholson? You know, impersonation revenge?

McGee: Why would you let someone get away with rape?
Ziva: Perception. Burrows is in the military. If a woman cries rape, no man on that ship would ever totally trust her again.
McGee: Well, you're a woman. What would you do?
Ziva: I am different. After torturing them until they cried like babies, I would castrate them and give them what they deserve.
Tony: Hmm. Spoken like a true almost-American.

McGee: You just ruled out both suspects.
Abby: No, I didn't. I just proved someone smoked Llamas at Rock Creek park.
[McGee dials Gibbs. Cut to Gibbs making out with Karen. He picks up the phone.]
Gibbs: Gibbs.
McGee: Boss. I don't know if this is important, but-
Gibbs: McGee, this better be the most important phone call you make in your life.
[McGee tries to hand the phone to Abby, she dives out of the way.]

McGee: Ziva thinks that all men are liars.
Tony: Really? Ha, so if I were to lie to you, you would be able to tell?
Ziva: Particularly you.
Tony: [grins] You think?
McGee: Wouldn't go there, Tony.
Tony: Oh, watch and weep. True or false: I had eggs for breakfast this morning.
Ziva: True.
Tony: Lucky guess. Last night, I had a date with a very beautiful woman.
Ziva: False.
Tony: She's good. My first car was a shiny new red Corvette.
Ziva: False. Strike three. I win.
Tony: [looks bothered] How did -- how did you do that?
Ziva: When you said you had a red Corvette, you looked down and to your left. A tell-tale sign when people lie.
Tony: And the date?
Ziva: Tony, if you had gone out with a beautiful woman last night, you would have talked about it all day.
Tony: I would?
McGee: Oh yeah.
Tony: Okay, but how could you possibly know that I had eggs for breakfast this morning?
Gibbs: Gear up! Got a message from a dead guy.
Tony: Ready to roll, boss!
Gibbs: [walks past as the team grabs their stuff] DiNozzo?
Tony: Yeah, boss?
Gibbs: You got egg on your shirt.
Ziva: [smiles] Not just your shirt...

McGee: Ziva, what's going on?
Ziva: Tony has been selected to be on the cover of the new NCIS recruiting brochure.
McGee: Oh, you've got to be kidding me.
Tony: Hey, check it out. Who's the new face of NCIS? You're looking at it, McEnvy. Get used to it.
McGee: There will be no living with him now.
Ziva: Now??

Michael: I love her you know. I-I love her. You don't get it, do you? Huh? She wants everyone to believe she doesn't love me. Hell, I think even she believes it sometimes. [turns to the mirrored window between the interrogation room and the viewing room] Tell me what, how come, if you don't care about me, you can't take your eyes off of me right now. Huh? You can lie to the rest of the world, but you can't lie to your heart. Can you, Abby?
Gibbs leaves and turns out the lights in the interrogation room, revealing that there is no one on the other side of the window.
Michael: No, no, no, no...Abby? Abby! Abby! Look, I know you're in there! Abby!
Walking down the hall away from the room, Gibbs smiles.

Michael: We just got off on the wrong foot.
Abby: The wrong foot?!? The only right foot is my foot up your a--
Michael: Abby!

Mike: [to Gibbs] We're getting more alike you and me, Probie. Even feeling the same pain. I don't know how you didn't go crazy when you lost your little girl, maybe you did for awhile; maybe you still are. But I just know I've got to do what's right for my boy... I owe him that.

Missy Dawkins: Oh my god, I can't believe he's dead!
McGee: What was your relationship with the deceased?
Missy Dawkins: You mean he's deceased, too?